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My husband hasn't been able to ejaculate for 5 years now. I

Customer Question
feel I am the one...
My husband hasn't been able to ejaculate for 5 years now. I feel I am the one to blame. Is it because he is no longer attracted to me. He says he is satified because he almost cums but he doesn't cum. I am frustarted I am not doing my job as a partner/wife to him.
What would be the cause of why he is not cumming? I want to be the best wife I can be to him.
What is wrong with me or him and us?
Submitted: 4 years ago.Category: Urology
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Answered in 8 hours by:
4/11/2013
Urologist: Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD replied 4 years ago
Dr. Rick, MD
Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD
Category: Urology
Satisfied Customers: 11,453
Experience: 20+ years as a doctor. Internal Medicine Internship in NYC
Verified
Good Morning. I am online and available to help you today. Thank you for your patience.
Does he have any medical problems or take any medication?
Can he ejaculate with any form of stimulation?
Has he seen a doctor about this yet?
This is not an answer, but an Information Request. I need this information to answer your question. Please reply, so I can answer your question. I look forward to helping you.
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Customer reply replied 4 years ago
He can't with any masturbation. He says he almost cums but can't ejaculate? He is on blood pressure medication.
Urologist: Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD replied 4 years ago
Cindy,
Thank you for that extra information.
Is your husband able to maintain a good erection?
How long has this been going on for?
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Customer reply replied 4 years ago
Semi erection and not for long. Hard erection for longer time with Viagra, but it's 265.00 for 10 tablets at 100mg.
That is hard on budget and he just got a refill this past Monday. It has been at least 9 to 10 months since he had a prescription if Viagra before this recent refill. He keeps saying he feels like he is almost ready to cum they he can't - that is why I think it's me that turns him off? Although he gets turned on and gets hard I am confused and worried about him. He is barrassed and won't talk to the Dr about said it is just age, he is only 56.
Urologist: Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD replied 4 years ago
Cindy,
First of all, it is not your fault and your husband does not have to be embarrassed about talking to a doctor about this sort of thing.
I am glad that the viagra allows him to have an erection. That rules out a number of causes for his difficulty in having an orgasm.
Actually, your husbands problem is fairly common and is called anorgasmia. In the USA it is thought that somewhere around ten million men suffer from this condition at any given time.
Anorgasmia in men can be caused by a wide range of issues, from psychological issues (anxiety about the sex act itself), stress at work or home, or sexual abuse. In addition, chronic illnesses, pain, diabetes, hormone imbalances, alcohol use and prescription medication can all play a part in this condition.
So. As you can see, this is a very common issue....but since men don't talk to each other about these kind of things, every man thinks he is the only one to suffer with anorgasmia.
What to do? The first thing is for your husband to see his doctor for a full exam and work up to see if there is any physiological issue that needs to be corrected.
If everything checks out physiologically, then sex therapy treatment is very, very effective in correcting this issue.
Is there anything else you would like to discuss at this point or have all your questions been answered to your satisfaction?
I hope this information was helpful for you. But I do work for tips so I want to make sure you are happy with me before rating me. If you have another question on this or a related issue feel free to fire away. You may also receive an email survey after our chat, if you don’t feel that I have earned a “10” rating in all areas, please let me know what I can do to meet your expectations.
Thanks in advance,
Dr. Rick MD FACS
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Customer reply replied 4 years ago
being stressed from working 13 to 14 hour days 6 days a week and extended fam
Ily issues with his sisters and he is constantly giving money to our one adult son etc then when he says he feels like he is about to ejaculate but he can't why would he stop it or why does his body stop him from completing the act of having an orgasm?
Urologist: Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD replied 4 years ago
Cindy,
I am sorry to hear about all the stress your husband is under. But, in a nutshell, that amount of stress sure could be the cause.
Why? It is a subconscious thing that raises its ugly head by interfering with his sexual pleasure. He is not stopping the orgasm -- it is completely out of his control and out of his conscious thoughts.
The good thing? This problem can be fixed by addressing the underlying stressors. Once that is done his orgasm problems should resolve.
I would still go to an MD to rule out physical causes but, while there make sure the doctor knows ALL of your husbands history, including what you have just shared with me here tonight.
Does that make sense?
It's safe for you to press the positive feedback button now if you so desire. And, never fear, even after you press that button I don't go up in a puff of smoke -- I'll still be right here to continue helping you, but, as I do work for tips, I want to make sure you are happy before rating me.
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Customer reply replied 4 years ago
I can't get him to discuss this with his dr he thinks the dr will want to perform tons of tests and cost him a lot money he doesn't have? So where to I go from here? Is there something I can do to help my husband complete his orgasm and feel good as he always wAnts me to feel good so I am left feeling good but yet in a way I have let him down?
Urologist: Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD replied 4 years ago
Cindy,
He is a grown man. If he doesn't want to go to his doctor and get this fixed you can't (at least in the USA) tie him up and make him go.
This is not really anything you and him are going to be able to work out among yourself. It goes much deeper then just working/talking it out at home.
Perhaps you can help him to understand this....
I hope this information was helpful for you. But I do work for tips so I want to make sure you are happy with me before rating me.
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Customer reply replied 4 years ago
I do have further questions I don't want to "tie" my husband up but I do want to help him help our sexual relationship. If there is something I can do at home to make it better and you can help me that is what I am seeking Dr.
Urologist: Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD replied 4 years ago
Cindy,
I really wish that there was something you could do at home but this problem is much more difficult that.
You wouldn't want to treat a hear attack at home, would you? This needs professional help no less that does.
I realized that this was not the answer you were hoping to hear but it would be unfair to you and unprofessional of me were I provide you with anything less than truthful and honest information.
Surely, you prefer that I tell the truth rather than what you wish to hear. Because it reflects very poorly on me unless you press one of the top three faces, keep this in mind when rating my answer and please do not punish me for being honest. I understand that this may not be easy to hear, and I empathize.
Even though my answer was not quite what you were hoping for, please understand that my priority was to provide you with the most honest information. With that in consideration, I hope that you found my answer useful. Please click the excellent feedback button so that I can receive credit for my efforts.
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Dr. Rick, MD
Dr. Rick, MD
Dr. Rick, MD, Board Certified MD
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