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Thomas, Lawyer
Category: UK Law
Satisfied Customers: 7609
Experience:  BA (Hons), PgDip, Practising Solicitor
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My ex partner owes my mother 18,000 how do i get him to pay,

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My ex partner owes my mother £18,000 how do i get him to pay,
the money was for an extension that was built onto his house I have proof of the cheque my mother gave him and receipts for the cost of the building and labour i really need this sorted



Thanks for your question.


If you can prove that the transfer of the money by your wife to your ex-partner was a loan and not a mere gift then your mother(not you) has cause of action against your ex-partner. You have to formalise your efforts to recover the money owed.


In the first instance your mother should write formally to him setting out her cause of action (eg. details of when it was agreed, making him aware of her proof of payment and asking that he either pay you the sum of money within a defined period (7 or 14 days) or suggests a repayment plan. State that a failure to reply will result in your mother issuing a claim at Court to recover the monies.


If he does not reply, go and see a local solicitor to get him to write you a "letter before intended legal proceedings. This letter before action would essentially contain the information stated in your mother's letter but it will be on headed paper from a firm of solicitors so may in his mind carry more weight and prompt him in to engaging.


If he still does not engage then you have no other option but to issue a claim at Court for the money. Given that the amout of money owed is significantly over the threshold of £5.,000.00 for issuing in the small claims Court I would suggest getting a local solicitor to act for you (or at least in preparng the application to be submitted to Court).


If this has been useful please kindly click accept so that I may be rewarded for my time. It will be gratefully received and you will be free to ask follow up questions.


Kind regards,




Customer: replied 7 years ago.
it was not a gift or a loan at the time we were planning to do a childminding business in the added room, he broke up with me as the building was completed and therfore the building is still there and he is using it. he said he would give my mum back her money due to the circumstances.

he understands he needs to pay back the money and has paid £1500 back but nothing since and i just want a payment plan put in place, since he has made payments it proves he knows it wasnt a gift so do you think that will help her case? does that situation change anything and do you think i should get a payment agreemant drawn up so that it is legal that he owes her money

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
im just asking how i prove it wasnt a gift? does the fact that it was for a buisness count?

Does the fact that he has made payments prove that he knows it was not a gift and should therefore have to pay back the remaining amount



Thanks for your reply.


The fact that he has made payments in respect of the money does suggest that he knew it was not a gift and will almost certainly be persuasive to the Court that it was a loan.


Go in posturing to make an application, but mentioning that you would be prepared to have a payment plan put in place (by standing order/direct debit). It would be helpful to have his acknowledgment of the debt and the repayment plan in writing from him.


Please kindly click accept.


Kind regards,



Customer: replied 7 years ago.
sorry last question .... what is a posturing application?

No problem. It's not an actual legal application, I phrased it so that in writing to him you should 'posture' (ie. pretend) that you will make an application at Court to recover the monies. This will hopefully scare him in to action.


I hope this clarifies, if so please kindly click accept.


Kind regards,



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