Hello. I have a residence order for my 6 years old twins boys. Their father has a contact order to see them 2 hours at a time 3 times a week collecting them from a specific nursery. This order was issued in May 2012. They are now in full time school and no longer attend this nursery. Their father has recently been abusive towards them and me and I would like to put measures in place such that: - he can't have direct contact with the children unsupervised (skype and phone calls, i feel are safe) - he is deterred to come to my house or approach me in person More details:
: The contact gradually built from the order I mentioned above and since this September, the father was having our sons overnight on a Thursday. It has been going well and I and the children were quite happy with the arrangement and I even had told him he could take them on a holiday.
However, 2 weeks ago one of my sons told me their dad had squeezed his neck and that it was scary. And the other one said that his dad was cross because they would not tidy the bedroom and kicked a box of legos the hit my sons teeth. They asked me to tell him not to do that again. They still want to see him.
The dad admits to have grabbed Afonso strongly, but not squeeze his neck and to have kicked the box of legos but states he didn't see the box of legos hitting Leonardo's face.
There was domestic violence in the past towards me and he hurt one of my boys when he was only 12 months old, leaving his arm bruised.
at the time social services were involved, he was removed from the house and a few rules were put in place.
Also, after this event I've been probing more about how their dad treats them. My boys told me about their dad pinching their ears, pressing their head down and squeeze their cheeks to force them to eat faster.
Due to this, I researched and found a coach that volunteers to a charity specialized in working with men that have been abusive (he has developed and run programmes with social services) that was willing to see their father and me for free. I suggested this to their father who immediately reffused it, started shouting and offending me. Due to his behaviour, I told him, that if he didn't take help to change his behaviour he would have to face the consequences. That escalated things, he became furious and said I would not threaten or intimidate him. This was a phone conversation.
In the meanwhile, yeterday he appeared at my house at a time he knew i wouldn't be there because I was in work. My children were with my brother, who is only 18. My oldest child, who is 14, called me immediately. I left work and when I arrived he was leaving my house with his girlfriend. I let them walk further away from the house and then approached him. He didn't even let me say more than a word and walked aggressively towards me and shouting. I tried speaking to heim about not going to my house, he shouted very close to my face saying he would, and that I do not scare him. I continued trying to speak. He led his hand towards my neck but then seemed to regret the act because he was being watched by the girfriend and pushed me . then he grabbed me from behind throwing my head down towards his bycicle. I felt that if she wasn't there he would have hurt me seriously and I am now afraid of what he might do if he catches me with no one around, or even worth, when I'm with the children.
his girlfriend calmed him down and they walked away and so did I. I then called the police. They said an officer would contact me today, but no one has.
Any legal advice will be a truly appreciated.