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Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: UK Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34263
Experience:  25 years experience of all aspects of family law
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My husband and I separated back in 2011. He left the marital

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My husband and I separated back in 2011. He left the marital home to live with his mother. I have four children and they range in ages from 11 to 18. My ex is collaborating with my daughter to take all the children away from me. I have severe depression and the only thing keeping me sane and alive is my children. My ex has turned the kids against me as he has had money to shower them with gifts so has effectively bought their affection knowing that I will not be in a position to do so. He will be leaving me in the family home and I am worried that I won't be able to afford to live here especially with the new bedroom tax. I cannot even leave the house alone so is therefore turning me into a recluse. I am scared as I don't know what to do. Please if anyone can help me I would appreciate your advice. Thank you
Do you have a specific question?
HI
Thank you for your question
I shall do my best to assist you but I need some further information first.
How old are the children and how do they share there time between you and their father
Claire
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

My children are 11, 13, 17 and 18. I have 3 boys and 1 daughter. My daughter is 17 and has completely taken over my role as the boys mother as she feels that I am incapable of doing the role even though I have done my best. I feel that I have no say in anything that goes on in my life and especially now as both my daughter and ex have decided to take it upon themselves to undermine me and take my children away from me. The boys were happy but it seems that since their father came into some redundancy money, he has bought their affections and tried to lure them into thinking that life would be so much better if they lived with him than me. I am not in a financial position to do anything out of this world for the children, apart from feed, clothe and love them. I am at a complete loss. i don't know what I am trying to ask apart from if there is any help I can get to support me through this. At present the children live with me but see their father at the weekends but I have been informed that the arrangement will change within the next 6 weeks maximum as he now has a house of his own. There was no discussion just me getting told what was going to happen. I am not a strong person and feel that all of this has totally been taken out of my hands and control.

Hi
Have the boys said where they want to live?
Claire
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

they have all told me that they would be better off with their dad.

Hi
Have you talked about what time they will spend with you?
Claire
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

They havent even said they want to see me. my ex only ever turns things into.a row and says how useless i am. do you think a mediator might help? we just cant talk as adults

Hi
It is likely that the children will realise very quickly that living with Dad full time is very different from visiting and having money spent on them.
It would be an excellent ides to arrange to discuss this matter using Family mediation (www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk) and perhaps agree a shared care arrangement for three months with the children spending time with each of you and then a review at the end of it.
Your daughter may also find that looking after her father as well as her siblings is more of a burden than she expects
Claire
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: UK Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34263
Experience: 25 years experience of all aspects of family law
Clare and other UK Family Law Specialists are ready to help you