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Stuart J
Stuart J, Solicitor
Category: UK Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 22624
Experience:  PGD Law. 20 years legal profession, 6 as partner in High Street practice
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Hi, My brother has a contact order granted by the courts that

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My brother has a contact order granted by the courts that allows him to currently see his child every Sunday . There is also provision that this contact will increase over an agreed period of time to include overnight visits and ultimately alternate full weekend visits. The court order also gives equal rights with regards XXXXX XXXXX entitlement. An interim order allowed weekly visits that increased by an hour each week leading up to the court's final decision. This interim arrangement worked very well and all parties seemed to be happy with the arrangement. The weekend before the final court date dad and child had a lovely day out and everyone was happy. However, on the weekend following the final court date the child decided that she did not want to go with Daddy. This was obviously an emotionally charged situation and eventually dad decided that the best course of action was to leave the visit for that week. This situation has repeated itself on subsequent weeks with the only way for him to see his child being by agreeing to the mother also being present. The mother is refusing to take a more forceful approach with the child. What can he do to get the court order back on track?
How old is the child?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

4 years old (5 in August)

Can we have background leading up to this please from when the child was born?

How much involvement did father have in child's life?

Is the child protesting or is the mother saying this?


Customer: replied 4 years ago.

The father, until recently, had consistent contact from about 1 month after birth. The mother later denied contact which led to the court case. It was in light of this lapse in contact that CAFCAS and the court decided on the extended period of re-establishing contact.

I believe the child is protesting (the mother will certainly not be encouraging the contact) but no reason is being offered for this apparent change of attitude.

I find it hard to believe (so would court) that a 4 year old who has had constant contact until recently, is calling the shots.

Is it the mother or is the child screaming and crying when contact takes place? How is this reluctance communicated?

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

I believe that the child is crying and has expressed that she doesn't want to go. The mother has refused to put the child in the car and the father doesn't want to force this issue as it could be easily taken out of context. The father is becoming increasingly frustrated by the situation, particularly as he has had to go through the protracted court procedure and has in essence achieved nothing.

Previous contact was on the whole with the mother being present. It was the break down in this relationship that forced the court case. The mother refused mediation prior to court.

Whilst I cannot say that the mother is engineering this situation I would suggest that it definitely plays to her advantage.


If he
doesn't want to force the issue, what exactly does he want to do?

with mother present is never satisfactory and the courts will not order that.

If she
does not facilitate contact, and it goes back to court, she will have the
warning in the contact order highlighted (all the orders contain a warning) and
if she does not facilitate contact, she is likely to be ordered to do community
service and will end up with a criminal record.

she will see her solicitor who will advise to facilitate contact

explains a little more

Can I
help further?

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please ask.

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

To clarify one point: The 'hand over' for contact is usually at a local leisure centre. The issue that he does not want to 'force' is to be seen to be taking a screaming child from its mother and driving off with her. He also feels that the hand over should be more of the mother willingly handing over the child than him taking her.

He absolutely wants to maintain contact with his child and has already fought to do this via the family court system.

The question really is what to do next? Is there something that can be done before instigating court proceedings?

I can
appreciate that he does not want to go to court and by the same token he doesn't
want to beat his X with a stick.

will not agree to mediation and clearly is ignoring things.

suggestion would be strongly worded solicitors letter threatening another court
application to enforce the order.

would arrange the contact handover to take place somewhere else. At this stage
in time, the fact that the child is crying probably suits her as does the fact
that it's in public.

is no magic solution I am afraid I'm sure that you gather that already before
asking the question on here

Can I
help further?

Please don't forget to positively rate my answer service (even if it was
not what you want to hear). If you don't rate it positively, then the site keep
your deposit and I get 0 for my time
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