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JGM
JGM, Solicitor
Category: Scots Law
Satisfied Customers: 11271
Experience:  30 years as a practising solicitor.
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I have a welfare hearing to attend next week...i opposed

Customer Question

Hi...i have a welfare hearing to attend next week...i opposed the initial motion. I am representing myself as I think my 3 year old should have contact with her father. However he is asking for contact that I consider beyond her age and stage of development....he has contact with her through an intrim court order of every second weekend friday untill sunday which is good and mid week non residential contact on a Tuesday. ..The later is new and my daughter is not wanting to go...i have tried to get her to go and generated situations in the back garden whereby her dad can take her as it's too distressing for me to see...separation anxiety I would presume. Can I ask for this to be halted for the time being and weekend contact to be reduced given her anxiety and behaviour when leaving?? It's totally out of character for her.
He has also requested 2 weeks holiday during summer months which I feel is too long and would rather suggest Monday to Friday or long weekends untill she gets a little older...will the sheriff see this as unreasonable?
He has asked her for every second xmas but she also has two other siblings...my suggestion would be two hours every xmas eve as well as contact with her for 3 hours xmas day returning home and then going for residential contact boxing morning untill 27th every year...is this unreasonable ?? Just thinking about her needs but need to be sure that it's not unrealistic afore I represent myself...many thanks
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Scots Law
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
The interim order has been in court since 2013! Starting to feel like his demands are an infringement on my right...he had contact with her last weekend but recieved a text friday night when he had her to say he was going outwith the country and would not be able to have her for the full weekend...as a result I had to change my plans to accommodate. I asked him via text sunday to ask if I could have her for a family function this Friday night and he said no...why would I be in contempt of court but not him. He asked for her the following weekend prior to my request as extra and I agreed some weeks ago but feel he is being unfair...what do I do??
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I initially had a solicitor but decided to represent myself as I am not opposed to contact.....just opposed to duration requested given her anxiety and age and stage of development.
Last year offered that he reduced his hours at work to help with childcare but he didntbwant to do that....however i had to reduce my hours dramatically
Expert:  JGM replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
I don't think you are being unreasonable at all given your daughter's age.
I note that you are representing yourself. You must make sure that all the points that you have made to me, you make to the court, and emphasise that you are acting in the best interests of your daughter and that is you prime consideration also stress the fact that you have tried to make the current arrangements work but they are not working.
I also think that your Christmas suggestion is generous. Most arrangements allow for a couple of hours only on Christmas Day but you are suggesting more than this.
You can also highlight the fact that you are trying to be flexible but he isn't. As far as Friday night is concerned I would simply say to him that as he insisted on you being flexible when he had to bring her back early, you expect him to do the same and that she won't be going with him on Friday because you have a family function which your daughter should attend.
I hope this helps. Please remember to leave a positive rating so that I am credited for my time.