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JGM, Solicitor
Category: Scots Law
Satisfied Customers: 11451
Experience:  30 years as a practising solicitor.
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hi jusleen i was wondering if i would be able to get some advice

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hi jusleen i was wondering if i would be able to get some advice about my 11 year old daughter, i also havae a 8 year old daughter too, we live with my partner of 4 years and the girls have been going to see my ex, their boilogical father every 2nd weekend or if we cant manage we are flexible to change it but of lately my ex has had problems with his partner as they unfortunately lost a baby so my eldest, 11 yrs old hasnt been getting on with his partner they just have no bond and stay out of each others way so i hear and she seems depressed but my daughter has been calling my partner dad and it came out of the blue last year but she has adhd and I did sit her down and say your own dad wont be too happy aboutt hat do u understand but she just said to me well mum i feel close to steven he is here for me all the time and i feel close to him so she continued but now my ex is kicking up a fuss understandably about someone else being called dad in his place but when my daughter goes to their house she has to go to my exs football and she doesnt enjoy it as she sees she has to go to watch him and why cant they do something for them instead, she is very reluctant to go even with my encouraging her but she doesnt want to go every 2nd weekend just one night a month really is about what she is doing but can my ex stop her calling my partner dad when she is at theirs as this is causing her major pressure and to tops it all off she has adhd, what should i be doing if anythign differently as ive now had my exs mother contact me saying it should top my partner being called dad even i my own home surely she doesnt have that right? thanks fiona
Thank you for your question.

The grandmother has no right to tell you or your daughter what to do.

And as I understand it you have asked your daughter not to call your partner Dad but she wishes to do so and has a nice bond with him. I don't think you can do any more. Your daughter is reaching the age that she can make these decisions for herself. For example, when she is 12 her view on where she stays and the manner of her welfare has to be taken into account by law.

If she wishes to lessen or change contact with her natural dad then her view have to be respected although she should be encouraged to continue the relationship with him.

As always I'm happy to discuss further.

I hope this helps. Please remember to leave a positive rating so that I am credited for my time.
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Customer: replied 4 years ago.


thankyou, i always say she should keep a relationship with her dad but she knos what she wants as she is just not close to him any longer but thankyou

As long as you try to encourage her and tell your ex that you are doing so you can't be faulted.

Please don't forget to rate my answer on the system so that I'm credited for my time.