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I’m engaged to my best friend... but she is very sensitive…

I’m engaged to my...

I’m engaged to my best friend... but she is very sensitive and has been causing problems with things my family does. My parents are starting to not approve of her.. but she’s my best friend and I can’t live my life how they see fit. I need help!

Expert's Assistant: The Psychologist will know what to do. Is there anything else important you think the Psychologist should know?

My older sister has a best friend and a little dog. Me and my fiancé have a dog. My mother favors my sisters dog and my finacees hates my mom for it. She also hates my sisters friend and refused to go to anything if she goes. Her friend goes to every birthday even and social gathering. This has all caused a huge problem in our relationship. I’m currently at my parents house and me and her are taking a break. But it all feels as if this was my family’s intent and they want me happy... but they don’t think our relationship is health. (They are very old fashioned)

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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
She hates my older sister and wants to kick her out of the wedding. She tells me that all she wants is for olivia (sisters friend) to not be invited and for my fiancée to be invited over her. and my sisters dog to be treated equal to our dog. My parents won’t budge and act like my fiancee is the worst person on the earth. I truly love her and want to marry her... but my parents are so set in what they think and won’t allow things to move on. I’m at a road block and do not know how to end this.
Customer reply replied 4 months ago
She was recently put on a medication called Abilify for her bipolar or whatever mentally is going on. She started 2.5 weeks ago. But I can’t notice a difference since we are no longer together.
Answered in 11 hours by:
3/17/2018
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,884
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified

It sounds like she is having a rough time with those in your family and friends for reasons that should not be so difficult..dogs, etc. It is not about your parents being right or wrong and more about them being able to see that this is a difficult relationship and want the best for you. I know you are hurting and want the relationship but the break may do both of you good! IT will give you time to look at things more critically and evaluate whether you can live with this turmoil ongoing. Sometimes the love is there but the long-term fit may be off. Give yourself some time and space and her as well and see if Abilify begins to work and she comes back and is willing to work on things without kicking people out of your life.

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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
This is great advice. Thank you
Customer reply replied 4 months ago
Do you know much about Abilify? Does it help with thinking rationally and coping with difficulties in life?
My pleasure. Please let me know how else I can support you. Please take a moment to click the rating faces to rate my support, you are not charged again for doing so, but without it i will not receive credit for my support. Thanks so much. It is hard to give a one-size-fits-all regarding medication and I am hoping that she was evaluated properly so let's hope that the Abilify can help with whatever anger and depression or anxiety she might be dealing with.
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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
She sees the psychiatrist for the second time on Monday for her first full month on the medication.
That is excellent. She is in good hands and they will adjust accordingly. Again every person is different some medications work for one and not another and he will play around with the dose until he finds The Sweet Spot.
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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
Her little brother drowned when he was 2 and is brain dead in a hospital bed. He’s currently 19. Unfortunately she’s had 2 abortions (which I don’t condone but lover her for who she is) so I think she has a lot of baggage and doesn’t know how to cope with these kinds of problems in her life. If she thinks something... she says it.
She has been through a lot and clearly wants to push people away rather than be vulnerable. Give her some time take some time for yourself and let's hope that she can start to feel safe again in the world.
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,884
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified
TherapistJen and 87 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
Thank you for everything! Hopefully she comes around.
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