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I’m having a bad day.... I actually thought it would be a…

I’m having a bad day......
I’m having a bad day.... I actually thought it would be a long time before I reached out to you again if ever... maybe it’s this time of year I don’t know.
I’ve been thinking about Darcy again... a lot actually... a part of me just wants to forget her and Just move on completely without a care or concern or so much as a goodbyeBut what makes her different is I just have a sense... an intuition .... that she doesn’t want me to go... I think to myself what’s wrong with me? Am I dreaming ? Am I imagining? I’m really not sure .... is it possible for me to feel so sure about this ? It’s never happened with someone else..I can’t keep beating myself up for this...
If I don’t reach out to her chances are she won’t to me...but then again there are many women that won’t even if they are interestedIs it unusual for me to feel this way ?
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
That’s three of my five children with me... thought you’d like to see the nutbag you’re dealing with
Answered in 14 minutes by:
1/23/2018
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,803
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified
Why do you put a boundary on when you can reach out to me?
It's a great thing that you reach out I am always here. I love the photo of you with the kids everyone looks fantastic. If you are feeling so strong about this then why not reach out and lay it all on the line? Again you have nothing to lose you are in no worse of a position if you put it all out there and she rejected.it. if she's open to it then great you know and if she isn't open to it then at least you know and you can begin to dust yourself off begin the healing process and move forward. I don't think that this state of limbo serves you quite well.
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
I’m a nutbag for sure lol you can check that box but the one thing I promise you that I’m not is a non confrontational male...I would really feel better with all the cards on the table. I’m a marketing sales guy by trade and typically take the maybe out of the equation...and I do agree with you on thatHere’s the problem ... she doesn’t handle direct serious conversation well... I’m not sure I articulated that accurately but I know her fairly well...Unfortunately for me is that she would be more open to a text message on the subject at least as the conversation starter...I’m not a huge fan of texting for a lot of reasons... and would much prefer a face to face or phone conversationBut that can make some feel boxed into a cornerI mean I definitely talk to her openly but we generally have a beer or two first ...This is so confusingShe’s very spontaneous ..... I was thinking maybe Friday I’d text her and see if she wanted to be spontaneous and head down town after work and if so try to have that conversation orIf that doesn’t work get out a text that simply saysWhile I’ve enjoyed our friendship over the past couple of years I’ve reached a point in my life where I’d like the opportunity to get to know youTheirs more to me then just an overly nice guy... perhaps I’ve been too nice if there is such a thing because I find you to be guarded and a sense that you’re hurting inside and I really don’t know why...I just know I act differently towards you because of this and I really want you to know the real Bill especially if I was to fade awayI know one thing for sure and that’s that I typically don’t act this way ....let me knowOh boy get the straight jacket !
I responded earlier and now I don't see it in this thread. I would send her the text but I would leave out the part where you think she is guarded as that could help her to put her guard up and defend that. So send you that text but leave that part out.
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
Thanks for all your patience with me I do appreciate it... most people don’t know I have a weakness like this... I’m always the boss and father and no one would ever think I ever felt insecure or inadequate or no worthy ... but I am human and it’s either talk to myself or you...I guess I always know the answers I guess I just need to bounce it off of you...I generally take your advice... last year you told me to have fun and go out with people ... well I went out with 20 different women ... problem is I get to know them and don’t like them ... I’ve gotten to know Darcy and like her.... wth? Lol
I am always here to listen and give my thoughts. None of these feelings you have make you weak...they make you human and a wonderful gentleman capable of feeling deeply. Do you want to write her the text?
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
I think I might ..hopefully I can ask her out Friday and if she’s free that must have meaning ? My guess is she’ll have plans . I know I always say I’m in the friend zone but I think it’s a little more than that... if that’s possible Idk
I probably should just not pressure her... I’m probably just wasting my time but one thing I know is every time I’m about to move on ... here she comes again out of nowhere
I hope it turns out in the way you desire...she definitely gives a lot if mixed signals keeping you wondering and guessing. Not easy on you but do not beat yourself up for any of your feelings.
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
Idk Jen I guess I’m just talking out loud... one thing I know is I’m ready now to have someone in my life ... couldn’t say that a year ago or so... that is if someone will have meI’ll let you know sometime!Not sure I’ll be back anytime soon...Thanks for all you do !Bill

I know you are ready and I do believe it will happen, whether it be with Darcy or another lucky woman.

I am here so please don't feel shy about coming back...why add that pressure to it?

TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,803
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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