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If he doesnt want to be in a relationship with me, why

doesnt he leave instead of...
If he doesnt want to be in a relationship with me, why doesnt he leave instead of giving me false hope?
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Answered in 15 hours by:
1/17/2018
John-Michaels
John-Michaels, Counselor (LPC)
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 979
Experience: 25+ years helping resolve relational issues.
Verified
I’m guessing he doesn’t know what he wants himself. Can you give me more information?
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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He doesnt communicate at all so I am left guessing what is going on with everything, then he carefully turns the situation around onto me. As he doesnt say anything its hard for me to just walk away as he just keeps denying it. We dont live together as I believe he still wants to keep his options open (although he says he doesnt) and have me as well. He has cheated on me before too and that has taken a long time to get over or try to. I am somewhat financially dependent on him and knows it and thrives on the control. He says hell move in but then creates something so he cant and then leaves me feeling like Ive been used.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Also he is 46 yrs old too.
The first thing I would say you need to do is find financial independence. As long as he senses he has control, it sounds like he is going to take advantage of it. As soon as you are able, I advise you to move on. Honestly, I would advise you to move Now. It just doesn’t sound he is going to ever settle down. You are too good to wait on him. You are better than that.
John-Michaels
John-Michaels, Counselor (LPC)
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 979
Experience: 25+ years helping resolve relational issues.
Verified
John-Michaels and 87 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Thank you for your response. I know inside I need to leave, I just have a few things not on my side at the moment. I have been isolated since being with him, he has manipulated my friends and family to the point where I no longer speak with them let alone ask for help, I am currently unemployed and looking constantly for work and I dont have enough funds to be able to have a few options up my sleeve. He knows all this too and whenever I have had an interview for work he has made it so hard for me, example creating an argument the night before, putting me down to the point where I've been crying and look terrible for the interview etc etc. If I start to do my own thing he will indirectly punish me like not allow me any mobile phone credit or I won't be able to buy enough food etc. I can't get a loan as I have tried before with him and it has damaged my credit rating. Meanwhile he does what he wants and most likely with whomever but punishes me. This is really tricky and not easy whatsoever to get out of. It's like a Web and the manipulation is mind blowing, it's just I'm not trained like you are to know how to deal with it in my current situation and stay strong. I really appreciate your help with this. Thank you.
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