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I've had two extremely stand-up "good" men in my life over…

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I've had two extremely...

I've had two extremely stand-up "good" men in my life over the past few years and in both instances, I've been very hard on them, almost giving tough love as I would give myself. I'm extremely hard on myself as it relates to day-to-day life, how I respond to things, how I conduct myself, etc. and I feel like treating my past boyfriends in the same manner ultimately led to our demise - at least that's how I feel. Could this be the case OR are these just not the ones for me and I'm just feeling the need to be tough on them in an effort to make it work when they're just not the one for me?

Expert's Assistant: The Psychologist will know what to do. Is there anything else the Psychologist should be aware of?

I've struggled with anxiety and depression as far back as I can remember which contributes to the tough love I give myself. Hence, why I think I've done the same thing to my exes. However, I want someone who holds themselves to a high standard as well.

Submitted: 3 months ago.Category: Relationship
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
I do want to add a few things:
First, I AM under the treatment of a professional for the anxiety and depression.Also, I thought it may be helpful to provide a couple examples of what I mean when I say "tough love".
- Cleanliness: I'm very aware of cleanliness and 98% of the time. If I use something, I put it back where it goes. If I splash water on something, I wipe it up. Things like that...ESPECIALLY if I am in someone else's home. If my significant other didn't do the same, I would call them out on it and voice my frustration that they aren't paying attention to what they're doing.
- Self Confidence: While I still struggle with this myself, it kills me when I'd see my exes act like they were less smart or intelligent than they were. This also related to common sense issues where I KNEW they were smart enough to "get" something or knew better than doing something. I would also voice my frustrations with each of these types of situations.I've become very "hyper-aware" as I've gotten older - very self-aware, very aware of things going on around me, and very aware of the behavior of those I spend time around. This is a blessing and curse.Finally, I was the one to end the relationship with both men I reference. Hope these details help!
Answered in 3 hours by:
1/3/2018
Counselor: Rev.Dr. August Abbott, Clergy replied 3 months ago
Rev.Dr. August Abbott
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7,777
Experience: Ordained minister: Counselor (spiritual/life)
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Rev.Dr. August Abbott
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Rev.Dr. August Abbott, Clergy
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Satisfied Customers: 7,777
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Experience: Ordained minister: Counselor (spiritual/life)

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