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Man I was seeing for 4 years broke up since he said he was…

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Man I was seeing...

Man I was seeing for 4 years broke up since he said he was not interested in me or his exes. After visiting his ex from 40 years ago, they fell in love and now engaged. But he says he misses talking to me and send texts about things we did. Together. Breaking my heart

Submitted: 4 months ago.Category: Relationship
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Answered in 14 hours by:
12/29/2017
Counselor: TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC replied 4 months ago
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,806
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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It sounds like he is confused and a bit all over the place..giving him some time and space may allow him to miss you further and come back....if you are available to him all the time then he can have the best of all worlds and be with the ex and also reach out to you when he misses you. Take a step back and let him figure out what he truly wants and be direct and open with him about what you want!

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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
Thanks. He always send personal Im . Nothing general. I wished him a happy thanksgiving but never responded. About a week later. He sent s picture of someone cuddling and said I thought of our get together s when I saw this picture.
Counselor: TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC replied 4 months ago

So keep letting him be the one to reach out but not to have the best of both worlds...only if he is wanting to be with you and not keeping you hanging on for no reason.

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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
Thanks. He hooked up with this lady in feb when he went to visit her in Missouri. She has been after him for over a year to be with her. I did not hear from him till sept when he started to text me personal stuff. . This lady list her husband recently but has been married 7 times. I don't know if he feels sorry for her or he wants to relive something they had hot and heavy 40 years ago.
Counselor: TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC replied 4 months ago

Who knows what the motivation is but I think having a clear boundary for yourself around this will be most helpful.

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Customer reply replied 4 months ago
Thanks again. He can't wish me happy thanksgiving but can send personal messages. Very confusing. I don't message him till I hear from him and usually a few days later
Counselor: TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC replied 4 months ago
Because when it works for him it works for him. Be strong and live your life.
Please take a moment to click the rating faces to rate my support. You are not charged again for doing so so without it I do not receive credit for my support. Thanks so much.
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Counselor: TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC replied 4 months ago

Please let me know how else I can support you. If all good for now, please take a moment to click the rating faces to rate my support. You are not charged again for doing so, but without it, I will not receive credit for my time. Thanks so much.

Jen

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Counselor: TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC replied 4 months ago
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