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I have two children, both girls, 18 and 20. They are both in…

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Second opinion] I have...

Second opinion] I have two children, both girls, 18 and 20. They are both in college, doing well, etc. My youngest daughter started to gravitate towards her father when she turned around 13. I thought it was a phase - i.e. hate mom phase, but she has not just outgrown it but become even more focused on her dad. She has basically told me that she does not need me in her life - she is fine just having her dad. I have tried multiple time to discuss with her the what/why/where did it go wrong between us. She refuses to talk about it. She has no interest in making our relationship better and will not seek counseling with me. She is impolite, dismissive, and irritated constantly by me. My older daughter has told my younger, you are so rude and impolite. My husband thinks i am the parent and therefore i am the one who should be fixing it. I don't know how. I truly don't. I question if is

Expert's Assistant: The Psychologist will know what to do. Is there anything else important you think the Psychologist should know?

I feel like I am in an emotionally abusive relationship. If she was not my child, I would have written her off long ago. what tactics are there.

Submitted: 8 months ago.Category: Relationship
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Answered in 6 hours by:
11/26/2017
Counselor: John-Michaels, Counselor (LPC) replied 8 months ago
John-Michaels
John-Michaels, Counselor (LPC)
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 980
Experience: 25+ years helping resolve relational issues.
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Hello, my name is John. I am so sorry you are going through this. From what I gather her, there are a few tactics that might help. One, your husband needs to back you up. He needs to make it clear he is on your side regardless. Two, you need to acknowledge you can demand respect, but you can’t demand love. Just be her mother and hold her accountable for her words and actions. Don’t argue with her. No yelling or lecturing. Just back your words with action and consequences. Third, you and your husband need to be on the same page. Whatever you say represents his view and vice versa. Fourth, sit her down and tell her you are this. Last of all of actusll first of all, plan something special with her. Maybe a special weekend and s concert. Something just for the two of you. Try to work some quality time with her.
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Counselor: John-Michaels, Counselor (LPC) replied 8 months ago
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