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She knew my thoughts about Netherlands. I say thoughts

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Hello,Yes, she knew my thoughts...
Hello,Yes, she knew my thoughts about Netherlands. I say thoughts because I was not certain, and she was telling me that she is maybe moving to Malta for 3 months. That was the first problem from the beginning that she doesn't want a connection with me because of Malta and Netherlands. But we talked about it and I was sure that I was not going to Netherlands. After a few weeks later she told me that she declined her job opportunity and that she is not moving to Malta either... after that everything was good. So I think our "movings" wasn't the problem.Honestly, I thought the feeling will be worst today, but I'm kinda OK with everything. Maybe my thoughts of that she does not have feelings for anyone else is cheering me up, and that she just needs bigger space in her mind right now. (I hope that is the real problem) I'm willing to accept and wait as long as She needs to.But if it is true, that her feelings changed, and she has feelings for someone else, I think I should move on. Do you agree? I need to think of that side too, I'm not proud of it, but it is the truth.
As I said, I will find out that on weekend. I would really love to know that because I really care about her and I want her to be happy and I don't want to be in the middle of others relations, and of course for my sake too.Best Regards,
Atila
Submitted: 8 months ago.Category: Relationship
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Answered in 2 hours by:
11/15/2017
Counselor: Therapist Leslie, Counselor replied 8 months ago
Therapist Leslie
Therapist Leslie, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 445
Experience: Owner and Psychotherapist at Self-Employed, Private Practice
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Good afternoon, Atila.

Ahhhh yes, I absolutely agree. If she does have feelings for another than you certainly need to move forward. I still doubt that she does though. When you say you'll find out this weekend, what do you mean?

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Customer reply replied 8 months ago
I mentioned last time a female colleague, and she is a very good friend with her, she told me that she'll see what happened really because she can't believe it either. After what she told her about me, and now this? My colleague is confused too.She askes me every single day : Did she called? Did she texted?
And when I say NO, she is like : OMG what's the deal with her, how is that possible. - and those sort of thing.Maybe I'll found out, maybe not, if that is what makes her happy, not being in touch with me, I will accept it, her choice her "happines". Again I'm really up for "waiting" but only if it has a point.I'll give you update if I found out something :)
Counselor: Therapist Leslie, Counselor replied 8 months ago

Wow Atila, this is certainly confusing and I guess it's good for you to speak with her friend to have assurances and not feel as baffled by her behavior. Yes, please keep me posted. I'm truly hoping she puts down her walls and reaches out to you.

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Customer reply replied 7 months ago
Hello Leslie,I promised you an update.
It was almost one month that she didn't call and texted.
I was telling you about that guy in the workplace who knew her.
He was at her place and she brings up the theme about me (they are old friends, and when we were OK, she didn't even tell him about me).
She told him that we were texting, talking meeting and everything, but that disappeared, *she was telling him what happened*. He told me that he talked with her, and what she told him about me. He was telling that she did not have any "bad" words about me, she was even always smiling when she mentioned my name.
Long story short...I told my side of the story, it was the same except for that she taught that I was in DEPRESSION.
He told her that he talked with me too, and she was like: "OMG what was he talking about, please tell me *she was blushing*. He told her that if she would love to know what have I told him, that she needs to call me and set up a meeting and then she will know my thoughts.After 4-5 days (last Sunday) she texted me. I was soooo happy, but also cool.
We talked about like: What is new? How am I doing? and that stuff.
Then the day after we didn't texted because it would be early again to rush into it.
Then the 3rd day I texted her, but didn't answered me, but she did the next day, and she was telling me that something is wrong with her phone and she is SO sorry and that I should know, that the phone was the problem and that I don't think that she doesn't want to answer.She felt bad. But I knew that is the truth I was cool about it. I was going to the Netherlands, and at the airport, she answered me on my text from the day before and asked me what am I doing, and I answered her that I'm going to the Netherlands. She was like: OMG you are Lying, for how long? I wanted to joke about it and I told her I'm going for a little vacation. She asked me for how long, and I answered: 1 year.
She was OMG that is little for you? ahahah... She tried to be funny, but I knew that she felt BAD.
But I told her that I was joking and that I'm going for 4 days. She was relieved. We were texting, and texting, and texting, and in one moment she started bringing back the old "kiss" and "heart" emojis.
We were texting every day I was away. One day there were kisses, then in one day it was gone, AGAIN.
We are still texting (except for today, I think we need some pause for now)Yesterday my colleague, her friend before work went to her and asked her about us, how are we doing and those stuff, and he asked her when we will meet. She told him that we are texting, and I was away and there was no time yet. He told her that he said to her that he doesn't want to hear about texting because it is stupid and a waste of time (I agree) He even asked her will we meet on this week, and she told him that it is a possibility that we will meet on the weekend. She didn't tell me anything yet, I think she is scared and even has a regression. But we will see. I would really love to ask her out but I'm scared because of the last time I asked here and she told me that she likes someone else bla,bla. But I think that she needs to be one (yes, I'm a male but after everything I don't want her to think that I'm rushing into it again. Remember, she was the one who stopped everything).So these are the news. I think it started going well, because there are still feelings for me.
She texted me again first, and if someone told me that I'am wrong, then I don't know again.
Because my thoughts are, that if she didn't want to hear about me she would forget me long time ago, and did not texted me.I wroted you everything in deep details because I wanted you to know everything.
I would love to hear your thoughts and suggestions.Best of the best regards,
Atila :)
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