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I have OCD, depression, eating disorder. I used to not be

able to have family or...
I have OCD, depression, eating disorder. I used to not be able to have family or friends over unless I was my perfect self. That would mean eating good and on my low weight side and active. I started taking Prozac this year and have lowered my standards. I also was able to see people at various feelings not only when I was perfect. I also lost a few pounds naturally and was not letting eating control me. I have also been under a lot of stress and gained 10 lbs. I now gained approx 10 pounds in the last few months. i am 5'2" and now weigh 124 lbs. We were planning to have friends amd family for Thanksgiving, but now I feel so horrible and do not have things under control. I feel I do not want the company anymore. They are looking forward and my husband is as well. What should I do. Should I cancel it and have thanksgiving just with husband and kids or should I allow it rather than ruining everyone's plans. If I go through with it how can I if I am now fat, feel horrible, and depressed about many things?
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Answered in 13 minutes by:
11/15/2017
TherapistMaryAnn
TherapistMaryAnn, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 5,878
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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Hello, I'd like to help you with your questions.

It is a good idea to face your concerns and go forward with your plans. While it is understandable that you do not feel your best, ***** ***** mind that those are your concerns and not something others are bothered by. No one should care what you look like or your ability to keep to a certain weight, especially if everyone is looking forward to seeing you and your family. It sounds like they like seeing you, which tells you something about how they feel about you. People don't look forward to an event or get together unless they enjoy the company.

It's important as well to note that your feelings are connected to what you feel about yourself (eating disorder) as well as a possible need to feel perfect or to have everything perfect (OCD). While your feelings are certainly important, these concerns do not occur to other people. Have you have ever felt that something in your life was a huge priority but others don't seem to care? Almost everyone has that feeling from time to time. It does not mean it is not important, but who it is important to matters. For you, you may not feel your best. But that does not mean you won't look your best to others. You have a different measurement of yourself than others do.

Between now and the holiday, try to do something for yourself that helps you feel better. If you have time, go have spa day or go even just an hour or so. Have your hair cut or buy something to wear that makes you feel happy. Or do something for someone else that makes them happy. Taking actions that are selfless can help you gain a deep satisfaction about yourself and your situation. It doesn't have to be huge- send a card to a sick person, make a meal to share with an elderly neighbor, pay for someones coffee in line or smile at others when you are out.

You may also want to touch base with any treatment providers you may have. If you see a therapist, ask for an extra appointment to talk out your concerns. Reach out to understanding friends, family or even call a hotline. Talking about your feelings can help you feel less alone and supported by others.

I hope this has helped you,

MaryAnn

TherapistMaryAnn
TherapistMaryAnn, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 5,878
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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Customer reply replied 30 days ago
Thank you so much. I moved over the summer and been out of therapy. I need to find a therapist and have been procrastinating making it worse.
The problems with myself make me feel angry at others even though I have nothing to be angry about. I do not react on it though. I will take your advice. I remember my old therapist said I do not need to be my perfect self in order to do something. Thank you so much for your advice. It was very helpful.
Customer reply replied 30 days ago
Do you know any hotline numbers?

You're welcome!

It's natural to project some of your feelings onto others. What you are dealing with is not easy. But you have good insight and that makes a big difference. If you know you are angry, you can cope with it, which it sounds like you are doing. Support can help a lot.

Here is a hotline that may help:

http://www.contacthelpline.org/emotional-listening-support/

Take care,

MaryAnn

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Customer reply replied 30 days ago
Thank you so much!
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