Relationship

Have Relationship Questions? Ask a Counselor for Answers ASAP

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

This answer was rated:

My boyfriend and I were together for 5 months now. We were…

my boyfriend and I were...
my boyfriend and I were together for 5 months now. We were having a wonderful time. I was sure he was in love with me. All his words and actions pointed that way. He said he was serious about me, was always thinking about me, wants to have sex with only me, and was missing me all the time. Then, after a wonderful afternoon, we got into an animated discussion about our feelings for each other. He broke up with me saying he does not love me. We met again a couple of times afterwards, only for him to say he misses me, has strong feelings for me, was not planning to break up, and wants to be sexually with me only. But that he is not in love. And he cannot promise me a future I want (family together, 4 years down the lane). Long story short - we are broken up. Still he attempts to stay friends. And I am allowing him although I am heartbroken. What do you think is going on? Shall I just move on/wait for him/stay friends?
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Relationship Question
Answered in 4 hours by:
9/21/2017
Dr.G.
Dr.G., Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1,569
Experience: Licensed Psychologist
Verified

Hi there. I am sorry to hear about your situation. I really can't tell what is going on with your boyfriend. He did lay it out that he is not in love and doesn't want to waste your time, so I guess that is his reasoning. Likely, he is afraid of commitment. He also probably has unrealistic expectations of the perfect woman he is searching for. But again, this is all a guessing game. As for you, I understand being heartbroken, but I think it is time to move on. He stated his stance on the relationship and you have to respect him for that. Like I tell people, you date to see if there is compatibility. If no compatibility then you are free to move on to another relationship. That is the whole point of dating. I give him kudos for stating his feelings up front like this and not dragging you down a dead end relationship. What do you think?

Ask Your Own Relationship Question
Customer reply replied 10 months ago
Thank you. He is again saying how much he missed me, wants to kiss me etc. And how if both of us end up in Lugano we could be sort of together (this part was implied). But i am just gonna take it as his residual feelings. And be a friend only. So I said "Oh, it will pass."

Well, I think that might be the best route to go. I just hope he is not using you for sexual favors. When someone says they sort of want to be together that usually means they just want to be with you for sex. Being a friend to him may be fine, until you meet someone more serious then the relationship with this guy is likely to end.

Ask Your Own Relationship Question
Customer reply replied 10 months ago
No, I am not sleeping with him since we broke up. He never asked me to, either.
Thank you so much for your help.

You are welcome and best wishes. Please don't forget to accept answer so I get credit.

Dr.G.
Dr.G., Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1,569
Experience: Licensed Psychologist
Verified
Dr.G. and 87 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
Was this answer helpful?

How JustAnswer works

step-image
Describe your issueThe assistant will guide you
step-image
Chat 1:1 with a counselorLicensed Experts are available 24/7
step-image
100% satisfaction guaranteeGet all the answers you need
Ask Dr.G. Your Own Question
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Dr.G., Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1,569
1,569 Satisfied Customers
Experience: Licensed Psychologist

Dr.G. is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help.

Mary C.Freshfield, Liverpool, UK

This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!!

AlexLos Angeles, CA

Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult.

GPHesperia, CA

I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion.

JustinKernersville, NC

Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around.

EstherWoodstock, NY

Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know.

RobinElkton, Maryland

He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here.

DianeDallas, TX

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

TherapistMaryAnn

TherapistMaryAnn

Counselor

1,744 satisfied customers

Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues

Ms Chase

Ms Chase

Life Coach

853 satisfied customers

Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues

Alicia_MSW

Alicia_MSW

Psychotherapist

468 satisfied customers

Specializing in relationship/family counseling

Dr. Norman Brown

Dr. Norman Brown

Marriage Therapist

427 satisfied customers

Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples

DrJackiePhD

DrJackiePhD

Doctor

385 satisfied customers

I have been doing research in relational/interpersonal communication since 1998. My Ph.D. is in interpersonal communication.

Dr. L

Dr. L

Psychologist

366 satisfied customers

Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.

Suzanne

Suzanne

Therapist, LCSW

338 satisfied customers

Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency

< Previous | Next >

Related Relationship Questions
My ex and I were together for 7 years and we split up for
My ex and I were together for 7 years and we split up for reason at the time that are now being seen by me as different.. I miss him and I want him back.. I realized within the last year that we've be… read more
DrJackiePhD
DrJackiePhD
Doctor
Doctoral Degree
385 satisfied customers
My ex wanted a break about a month ago to work on himself
My ex wanted a break about a month ago to work on himself and get his life together and he promised we'll get back together. But I couldn't stop talking to him, so we kept arguing and it led to a brea… read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
961 satisfied customers
My boyfriend broke up with me two weeks ago and it left me
My boyfriend broke up with me two weeks ago and it left me heartbroken because I was still and still am in love with him. After breaking up, he says he still really cares about me and wants to remain … read more
Jen Helant
Jen Helant
Bachelor\u0027s Degree
365 satisfied customers
I feel like this whole story will sound dumb but I am a professional
I feel like this whole story will sound dumb but I am a professional mom of 2 who honestly is not a dumb person. I am hurt and I don't know what I should do with this situation. I've been dating a guy… read more
Jen Helant
Jen Helant
Bachelor\u0027s Degree
365 satisfied customers
Hi Dr. Keane.I got into a major fight with the guy Im
Hi Dr. Keane. I got into a major fight with the guy I'm seeing on Friday. We are both gay men (I'm 25 he's 24) and we have been hanging out for the past two months. He's told me from the start he just… read more
Dr. Norman Brown
Dr. Norman Brown
Marriage Therapist
Doctoral Degree
427 satisfied customers
Hi, Ive been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. We started
Hi, I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. We started our relationship in the Netherlands (where I'm from). He was not 100 ready when we started the relationship but because we were so in love, … read more
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Adjunct Professor
Master's Degree
1,014 satisfied customers
Even though I havent heard from my ex-boyfriend in almost
Even though I haven't heard from my ex-boyfriend in almost three months I am still worried about him. The last timr he contacted me was August 26th at 2 or 3 in the morninf, calling about 16 times and… read more
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
847 satisfied customers
im so confused weve been off and on for 5 years now,started
im so confused weve been off and on for 5 years now,started off kind of crazy i was seeing his best friend when we would fight mike n i would hhok up ,he was also engaged since then ive broke up w his… read more
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
847 satisfied customers
my partner and i ran a business together for 12 years previously
my partner and i ran a business together for 12 years previously he was my boss, he had failed marriage we met when i was 18 then again when i was 22 fell in love strong sexual connection.alwys disagr… read more
psychlady
psychlady
Clinical Director
Master\u0027s Degree
3,517 satisfied customers
Ive been seeing a guy for 6 weeks, everything has happened
I've been seeing a guy for 6 weeks, everything has happened really fast. We slept together after the 4th date .I have strong feelings for him and we have great chemistry and sexual attraction.There ha… read more
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
847 satisfied customers
My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years and lived together.
My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years and lived together. We broke up about 3-4 months ago (it was a long process, moving out, etc). We've been in touch since and have discussed that if things … read more
psychlady
psychlady
Clinical Director
Master\u0027s Degree
3,517 satisfied customers
Im worried about me and my partners relationship. Weve been
I'm worried about me and my partners relationship. We've been together for a little over a year now and for the first 6 months we felt like we were made for each other. Then we broke up for a while ov… read more
psychlady
psychlady
Clinical Director
Master\u0027s Degree
3,517 satisfied customers
The man i love may still be in love with his deceased ex
I have an ex boyfriend that i have known for ten years. We broke up when he moved to college. i didnt want a long distance relationship, he did. Later he ended up seeing someone else, a female friend … read more
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
1,569 satisfied customers
i borke up with my boyfriend about 4 days ago, and realized
i borke up with my boyfriend about 4 days ago, and realized how much i wanted him back so i asked him out again he said he not sure that we should get back together he thinks i no longer love him as m… read more
Ed Johnson
Ed Johnson
Senior HR Consultant and Business Devlpm
Bachelor's Degree
6,994 satisfied customers
My ex boyfriend called me after a year, he broke up with me.
My ex boyfriend called me after a year, he broke up with me. I have not seen or talked to him since then. He said he misses me and we are planning to meet for lunch soon. I want him back, but is this … read more
Cher
Cher
JustAnswer Expert & Mentor;Teacher/Tutor
Masters Degree
1,382 satisfied customers
He seems like the perfect guy. He is perfect for me, he is
He seems like the perfect guy. He is perfect for me, he is the most perfect person in all ways.. the thing is that I am not sure if he is the one? am I wrong? I expect the flame you felt at 15, I love… read more
Ms Chase
Ms Chase
Life Coach
853 satisfied customers
I have been with my bf on and off now for 12 yrs. He ...
I have been with my bf on and off now for 12 yrs. He just broke up with me again. I love him and we just bought a house together. He told me he still loves me but we just don''t work together. When I … read more
KimberlyF
KimberlyF
High School or GED
554 satisfied customers
My boyfriend just broke up with me (I suspected someone ...
My boyfriend just broke up with me (I suspected someone else but wasnt sure) he says he misses me and we still see each other once a week..which is ok with him because he wants to still be friends..i … read more
Ms Chase
Ms Chase
Life Coach
853 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x