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I have begun dating a new guy for a little over a month. He…

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I have begun dating a...
I have begun dating a new guy for a little over a month. He is really wonderful but I am not sexually attracted to him. I know it's shallow, but I have been trying to get myself there and hope the attraction grows and I'm just worried it'll never get there. It's unhelpful that he has some performance issues--specifically, can't keep it hard for long. I'm starting to dread it. Is there anything I can do to get past this?
Submitted: 11 months ago.Category: Relationship
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Answered in 5 hours by:
9/17/2017
Counselor: Therapist Leslie, Counselor replied 11 months ago
Therapist Leslie
Therapist Leslie, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 445
Experience: Owner and Psychotherapist at Self-Employed, Private Practice
Verified

Good evening, Liz, and thank you so much for your message. I realize it's difficult to reach out. Please know I honor your courage.

My name is ***** ***** I am a psychotherapist in the Metro Boston area.

Oh dear, sweet soul, I understand your angst all too well. I think many of us have shared this issue. First off, I'm pleased you found yourself a very nice man--this means you make healthy choices as it sounds like he is very sweet. Secondly, you are very wise to give this man an honest chance in hoping some romantic feelings will surface. BUT...if after only a month, you are dreading intimacy, this relationship does not stand a chance.

I think you know this answer already but feel badly as he's been kind but please stop putting yourself through this torture. It's not fair to either of you. Please let him know he is a beautiful person but you are missing the romantic connection.

Have I answered your question? Is there anything else I can do to assist you further? I want to ensure you are pleased with my service. I also gently request you provide a star rating for me. Of course, we can continue to talk after the rating is provided.

Please take good care of yourself and feel free to contact me with any questions you may have.

Warm regards,

Therapist Leslie

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Counselor: Therapist Leslie, Counselor replied 10 months ago
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Therapist Leslie, Counselor
Category: Relationship
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