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Ask TherapistJen Your Own Question
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3398
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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I was an abused woman by my ex spouse. It's been 23 years

Customer Question

Hi jen, I was an abused woman by my ex spouse. It's been 23 years now. But my children never stopped believing that I am a stupid joke and disgusting woman. It's on an off , and after years of therapy I'm tired of the lowly treatment. Should I just give up . ? With trying with them I'm just ignored , I less I take the initiative. It's humiliating. Miss worn out.
Submitted: 8 months ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 8 months ago.

Hi welcome back. I understand how painful this is for you, but by you reaching out, it indicates to me that part of you does not want to give up on them. Rather than a complete cut off, it may be better that you come to a pace of acceptance for where the relationships are and the dynamic of them. So yes it may always be you reaching out and taking what you can get. Not a great space at all, but I am not hearing that giving up and walking away from them is truly what you want.

Customer: replied 8 months ago.
Do you think that nagging about it is not a good thing? I give up. Really. I got my son through alcohol rehab. And he is doing well. The Dad was alcoholic. But son won't give up his dependency to him.
Customer: replied 8 months ago.
Maybe call another time cause I'm in a public place.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 8 months ago.

I don't think the nagging helps you or the relationship. I would just be present with them in the relationship for how it is.

Customer: replied 8 months ago.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 8 months ago.

Take things day by day. I am here again if you need. Please click the rating stars and thanks so much.