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Category: Relationship
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We host people from around the world with Work Away and

Customer Question

We host people from around the world with Work Away and HelpX . So many, MOST ! will leave doors ajar, doors to the house as well as kitchen cabinet doors, leave keys in the locks, and I find this to be almost universal behavior. It shocks me , this carelessness to detail. We do have little dogs and double doors and gates to make a secure yard for them not to get out , not to be in danger of cars or run away, but most people seem to be ignorant about closing doors. I asked one guy, ''Do you have doors in France ? ''' Do you close them ? Do you have keys in France ? Do you lock your doors in France ? Do you have air conditioning in France ? and Do you leave your doors open when you have the a c on ? '' I have come to think that humans should never have moved out of caves in the first place. Caves have no doors so this would not be an issue. I do not understand this behavior at all. I have even put huge signs up on some of the doors. KEEP THIS DOOR CLOSED and etc. Interesting to me that this applies to French, Spanish, English, Chinese, Ukrainian, you name it, they are the same . It takes a serious , stern effort on my part to get through to close my doors and fence gates and I mean that. I had to not give keys out at all, even to my own son at one point. What the crap is this about ?
Submitted: 11 months ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  DakotaSouthFive replied 11 months ago.

Hello and thank you for using this site to help you. I host as well and you are right , what are they thinking sometimes?

What has helped me with the doors to the home so I do not have to give out keys, is a keyless entry so that when the door closes it is locked and a code has to be typed into the door to reopen the door. Also installing the type of hinge lever that automatically closes the door rather than rely on a person. With dog gates or fence gates, a tight spring that will automatically pull the door closed can help.

The do make hinges that will close cabinet doors at a certain point but if they are left wide open then it may not work.

Sadly there is nothing to turn off the AC, that takes human power but if you can fix the door problem then maybe the AC wont be wasted.

I also let them know that certain actions that go ignored and they will be fined for damages and extra money will be kept out of their damage deposit as there is a reason the rules of the house are made. Sometimes knowing this helps them to remember.

spring hinge

safety spring door closer

I do feel your pain!

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Too often we leave the dogs inside so we can open the gates to do some work or carry items back and forth - also the gate closers have hit me while going in and out so we opted not to use them this go around. I have the locks rigged so that a key can not be removed unless the lock is actually locked - I have taken the key away from all for the one area in front where our little dogs live for the most part. I have been smacked too often with gates that close with springs automatically. I do have my little dogs well trained to stay Back when I use that word so for me - its fine. The doors inside the house are an issue . I solved the outside door thing by taking the keys away - of my own sons also at one point. After a month of going the very long way around, they were willing to pay attention again . I had an issue with the freezer - freezer also, guests going ''shopping '' in it leaving the door open and using it as a fridge. It now has a pretty white chain on it and padlock and I have the key. Like I said, I believe in solving problems. I just wonder why ? what ? How ? What is the matter with the brains of humans who universally do these things ? ? I know how to solve the problems, but I am interested from an anthropology point of interest . For the girl who constantly left the kitchen cabinet doors ajar , one day I opened all the doors in the kitchen wide open for her to go and find it like that. She was shocked . I told her that this is how the kitchen looks to me when she leaves a door ajar. It did cure here 95 % of doing that. My questions is not how but why humans have this mental affliction and is there some remedy ? Like I said. I know how to solve the problem. I totally closed another door by jamming it so it Could Not be opened for a few months and they all had to traipse around the entire yard and house to enter. Who do you host ? also Work Away and Help X ? I have to take some breaks often with that hosting - its so helpful when it is but so distressful when its not. I have had to have some people leave because of the behaviors. There is almost always some conflicts but minor things are ok - what I see is the universal horrible habits of not closing doors. I don't get that. Nor do I want an electronic system with a code to have to use or worry about being passed on or having the system fail.
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
What is a pre-school assistant group supervisor ? I really need some clinical or psychology person who has studied the habits and behaviors of the earth bound humans. Until I began to host Work Away and HelpX I had no idea bout these issues. We had one guy who simply could not remember to close the toilet to flush and keep it closed. He knew nothing about a toilet flume , most do no. Ignorance. Pure and simple. I have considered the benefit vs the drama of hosting but then one comes along who really makes a huge and wonderful difference, contribution, to our projects here so I have continued , for now anyway. Also as I get older I am less willing to do the menial jobs of house cleaning. So now, what is a preschool assistant group supervisor ? What do you do ?
Expert:  DakotaSouthFive replied 11 months ago.

Your question went to the general category of which I am approved to answer. I assumed you needed help with keeping your house in tact. I will switch this over to a medical category.

Best of luck to you !

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Sally, I am happy to consult and confer with you for this but really I am now 78 ( I got old when I was not paying attention ) worked with Pan Am around the world for 40 years, raised 3 families, my natural born, my 6 adopted and the Shelter Home for Children, then my grand children also, had so So many lessons and much experience from all of it from the professionals who came to clean for me, the classes I had to attend, fascinating, the medical practice caring for all the kids, and weekly consulting with a child psychiatrist, and my own brains. I really am a problem solver. But I can't help but wonder what in the name of reason causes such universal behaviors as those I see now that I am hosting these people. Not only kids, but all ages and backgrounds also are part of Work Away and Help X . Its a fascinating study to me. When my front gate to the secure dog's area was left open - no problem - no key - no problem. I just took the keys away. Easy fix. Same with jamming closed the door that was left ajar between the a c and the utility room with no a c - pound a nail and that problem was solved instantly. Laugh at this one, My son and fiancé was hibernating in his bedroom , door closed, not ever out and about . I told him of course , a few times, kindly, then I took the door off and took it to the dump. Again problem solved. hah. I have raised 11 children, 5 at one time all within a couple years of each other and it was fun actually , lovely and fun with them. I still miss those years when I had to be problem solver to get things done and not be angry and mean and ruin our relationship. They still talk and laugh about the things I did back when, like take all the socks away from the boys because they kept leaving dirty socks all rolled up all over the house. Again - no socks , no problems. They were sock less for months until they came to me on their knees asking for socks if they worked odd jobs and bought their own. I did say yeah but with the condition that if I saw another dirty sock rolled up on the floor, they would lose their shoes and socks. Problem was solved. The girls laughed at them day and night. Pure fun. But very effective.
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Sally, what does a preschool asst group supervisor do ? Where do you work ? Day Care ?
Expert:  DakotaSouthFive replied 11 months ago.

Yes I was employed with an early education center for 20 years. Retired now. I worked with Special Needs children and with pre- school children overseeing the class and activities. Please do not respond to this so that another expert can help you. I'll go ahead and opt out.