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Ask Rev.Dr. August Abbott Your Own Question
Rev.Dr. August Abbott
Rev.Dr. August Abbott, Clergy
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7608
Experience:  Ordained minister: Counselor (spiritual/life)
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My ex gf and me broke up April 1st, she has since moved 400

Customer Question

My ex gf and me broke up April 1st, she has since moved 400 miles away with another guy who she is now dating! She randomly texted me about 10 days ago about something getting stolen that I bought her! Since then we have been talking for hours and hours via text message. She has told me she misses being home and misses her family! I have been super nice and have joked around and we have talked about our relationship and the good and bad! We never really get into it but we make comments back and forth and tonight she sent me a picture of herself naked to compare to one I took of her to show me how much weight she lost! She also says she misses me but not the bad stuff thT caused us to break up. I have been talking to someone about some issues I have had in past relationships and I sorta told her and she seemed to think I changed! I just don't know if I should be talking to her because I am getting feelings again and I don't know if she is just lonely or if she may really wish she didn't move away which she has said. I am so confused
Submitted: 12 months ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Rev.Dr. August Abbott replied 12 months ago.

It sounds like your ex is far more confused than you should be. My main concern is that you might be being manipulated in order to fulfill someone else's need(s).

The other thing to consider is the current boyfriend. No matter what might be going wrong in that relationship it's not right or fair to that man to carry on while it's still a 'relationship'. How would you feel if she lined someone else up while you were still with her? Or nude pics?

Whether she's feeling insecure, bored or lonely it really doesn't matter. Her behavior isn't respectful to her boyfriend, to you or to herself. She isn't respecting the relationship she's in; she isn't respecting your feelings and chances are that if she gets what she wants you're going to get hurt (again)

Take that step back and look at this whole picture; the situation from a wider viewpoint.

You're sharp - or you wouldn't be confused about this. You just need to hear that someone else is seeing what you think you are (seeing).

If you want to continue talking to her, it will be difficult, but you have to keep that point of view. And always, always ask yourself: If she's doing this to her boyfriend, why wouldn't she do it to you?

Until she asks for help and follows thru with getting it, this is who she is.

Nothing confusing about that is there? Trust your instincts

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