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TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3530
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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I used to be very close to my live in bf's (of 9 years) family.

Customer Question

I used to be very close to my live in bf's (of 9 years) family. 3 years ago I miscarried our daughter. Somehow, his older sister decided I was never pregnant and has decided she hates me. She refuses to speak to me, my twelve year old daughter or my sister and niece. She also has made it so unbearable that the rest of the family avoids me. I tried to speak with her when the problem first began, but she refused. The only reason I know why she hates me is because after a altercation at a family function another family member question ed her. My bf, won't confront her. All of our family has passed, except my sister, and I want to marry and have an extended family for my daughter. I try to explain how hurt I am and how ostracized and alone we are on holidays etc....but he says I'm being dramatic. It's been 9 years. His sister seems to rule him. I'm wasting my time aren't I?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
Sorry to hear this and I, like you, cannot understand why his sister got that in her head and has cur you off. You have tired to get her to come around and also ask your boyfriend to help. Like you, I don't see why she would magically change her mind which seems very closed. Comes down to what you want and will tolerate moving forward..if nothing changes do you want this?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
It's all very complicated. She's best friends now with his ex wife. I wish I understood. His ex called him the other night screaming over the phone ( I could clearly hear) that she could not believe he had become the kind of man that would choose a woman over his family. Your entire family hates her, she's a liar! I have shared ultrasound pics, his sister's daughter went to appt with me... I'm confused.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
He gets so borderline angry when I ask him to confront her.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
Ahh well if she is friends with the ex wife then it sounds unlikely she will let this go and welcome you once again. My experience tells me this won't change. If he won't support you and advocate then things will never change.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
Let me know how else I can support you.