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TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3396
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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Me and my boyfriend had a difficult month of december

Customer Question

Customer: ***** ***** Me and my boyfriend had a difficult month of december towards the end we had 4 wonderful days and brought in the new year together so i felt like we were getting back on the right track then the next day after our amazing 4 days he said he needed space for a week, but we could lightly text bc he wanted to talk to me on the phone but didnt think it would be helpful then the next morning he sent me a text message saying that on second thought he felt it was best to not communicate at all until he's worked through this and he's sorry for all the back and forth should i be preparing myself for the worst?
JA: Thanks. Can you give me any more details about your issue?
Customer: basically when we first met an issue came up regarding stds which we cleared up basically he thought i had brought somethjing in from a prior relationship so we both got treated and tested and everything was fine so we moved forward then fast forward once we began having sex and commited to eachother he began having some health problems - ( gastro issues ) his doctors said that he tested positive for herpes so he told me to get tested as well and of course i wanted to do whatever i could to support my partner in helping the doctors rule everything out well come to find out I have hsv 2 and i told him an hour after i had my results the issue is when he told me to get tested he didnt tell me about the results until i told him mine throughout this time ive been by his side supporting him, holding him at night - not knowing what the outcome would be 5 weeks of uncertainty and i still tried to remain positive to be a support system then after the 4 days he needed space ( during those 4 days he talked about valentines day togehter and taking a trip together ) i just need some clarity bc we are in love with eachother but dont want to create false hope also keep in mind i had no symptoms of either one which was even more confusing
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Customer: oh how long is the wait
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Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.

Usually when there is a back and forth like this as you describe, it doesn't look good for a lasting relationship. If there are worries now, it is har dfor that person to just turn around and feel that everything feels fine and they want to proceed with a full relationship. Whatever he is feeling is causing him to want this break. I would give it to him and see how it plays out, but my hunch says this doesn't end up as you desire.

Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.

Let me know how else I can support you.