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Martin, Engineer
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4944
Experience:  i'm 41 and i never stopped studying and experimenting
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How to deal with controlling in laws? My husband and I used

Customer Question

How to deal with controlling in laws? My husband and I used to live with them and they've been interfering from day 1. Now we've moved out 5 months ago and they're still saying when we can/ cant have our young daughter. My husbamd is working afternoon and nights and they're using this as an excuse that I can't have my daughter over alone.
My FIL was away on business the other week and my MIL was in hospital. And I found oiut the FIL hadn't returned yet and my SIL had my young daughter. Yet my FIL says I can't have my daughter alone? WTF? My husband has the opposite hours as my FIL so I'm left dealing with this crap on my own.
My SIL has also made threats to take away my daughter for no reason. When she doesn't get her way, she likes to threaten suicide. My in laws always have some excuse for the Ahole.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Martin replied 1 year ago.

Hi. Unless they have a court order, they have nothing to say about how you raise your daughter. Obviously if she is too young she need a Babysitter but someone with suicidal tendency is not suitable for this task (perhaps this is what was hinted that she was let alone as in the other person can't be considered a reliable custodian).

Now, how to handle in laws. It is never good to have trouble with relative but you really need to stand over them. Let them have some liberty but make sure that they know that you do them a favor and that they should not take more than allowed. Then be very clear on what you don't accept. The name of the game here is respect and clarity. Also never talk loudly to them even if you are angry, be very kind but also very firm at the same time.