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Ask TherapistMaryAnn Your Own Question
TherapistMaryAnn, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1694
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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Its been 5 months since I found out my wife cheated on me.

Customer Question

Its been 5 months since I found out my wife cheated on me. Initially she was kind of in shock like most people would be im sure, but she never showed remorse. Our relationship was never stellar, but weve been togethee for 8 years, married for less than
6 months. She claims i have been controlling and she gave up a lot for our relationship and the only thing to show of it is our son who is 6. She initially was for counselling and working on the marriage but has since taken a different attitude. She has moved
out and signed a year lease. She told me she wants a divorce, but wont file. She claims she needs to "process things and figure out the best way to go about things. To me, it sounds like she hasnt fully decided what she wants and wants to keep me on the hook.
I have been trying very hard to fix myself, and fix the marriage. I am well aware it takes two to fix a marriage but im wondering if there is any advice? Is divorce inevitable? Is she buying time? Is she waiting to see what I do? I know you cant tell me EXACTLY
what she is doing. But im curious what is common and what her motivation or psyche might be because her words and actions aren't aligning.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  DrPsychologist replied 1 year ago.

I would be very careful if I were you. She sounds manipulative. She may have hired a family law attorney who may have told her that because she moved out of the home she essentially abandoned you and/or your son. Make sure that you go meet with an experienced family law attorney as soon as possible. The earlier you can get help with this the less damage it will have on your life long term. Can you imagine if she was to withhold your son away from you as well??

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