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Vanessa,LMHC, Therapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 30
Experience:  Licensed Mental Health Counselor
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I think that my current (X) boyfriend is a cerebral

Customer Question

I think that my current (X) boyfriend is a cerebral narcissist; has exhibited all of the classic signs (controlling, dishonesty, small issues turned into a huge fight, flights of fantasy). Most recently we had a small disagreement, I blew up very emotionally and have not spoken with him in almost 90 days. He have given me the silent treatment, but never to this disagree. I tried to reach him the first two weeks, but have not tried since them. I am not cut out for this type of emotional belittling.
Do I need to send a note to formally close the relationship. I am ready to move on.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Vanessa,LMHC replied 1 year ago.

Hello and thank you for sharing information regarding your concern. There is no need to send a note to him since you are ready to move on. You will simply need to be sure that is what you want and then be ready to maintain boundaries if he attempts to contact you in the future. It would be best not to respond to him at all because entertaining him on any level opens the door to allow the potential for more controlling behavior, emotional manipulation and so forth. Change your number and other forms of contact if possible. You need to cut off all ties with him for closure. If you are aware that you do not want the relationship any longer, you do not need to notify him. Focus instead on the situation as a learning experience that you can use to determine what you want for yourself in future relationships. You deserve to be treated with respect and honesty. All the best for your future happiness! You will likely see more clearly once the relationship has been over for a period of time that peace has returned to your life.