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Martin, Engineer
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4922
Experience:  i'm 41 and i never stopped studying and experimenting
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This is a one: I have been with a woman 5 years who has two

Customer Question

This is a long one:
I have been with a woman for over 5 years who has two children. When we argue she grabs the kids and runs off. At first it was just to her bedroom, then leaving with them in the car. On top of that we got into an argument in the lockers at Disneyland and she grabbed the kids and ran up to security. Soon there were 2 and i could see another one coming. So i said can i go to the car and get my stuff. I didn't have keys and the security guard met me at the hotel and walked me to her car where i had to point to my luggage so that he could pull it out. I was not going to argue because at the time i was on probation for a DUI.
So i hopped on the amtrack and took it down to my dad's house.
She called and told me i abandoned her and the kids. I told her if the police came i probably would have gone to jail and violated my probation which would mean 180 day sentence.
This happened again at an amusement park 4 weeks ago. Her son (who is autistic) was yelling at her so I told him to stop then he starts yelling at me. Then for whatever the reason she starts telling me look what you did to ryan. I said i didn't do anything except get him to behave. Then they become her kids and i raised my voice so over to the side of the road we went and i was told to get out or she was going to call for help. So i left the park and went back to my place. She called and got mad when i told her i was heading home and it was again you abandoned me and my response was when you threaten me with calling for help i need to remove myself from the situation. A lawyer told me that. I didn't tell her that.
And those were only a few examples.
At a party two weeks ago i spoke to her ex-husband and asked him did she ever tell you she was going to call for help. Yes was his response. I didn't ask him what happened.
Is there anyway to explain to her the potential consequences of her actions.
Is there any way to get her to stop.
She has told me that whenever she feels she needs to she will call for help. I said fine but she needed to understand that i cant stay if she does that. I don't want to risk getting arrested.
we are close to breaking up but we have decided to see a couples counselor.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Martin replied 1 year ago.

Hi. Would you say she is a control freak in day to day activities?

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