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Ask TherapistMaryAnn Your Own Question
TherapistMaryAnn, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1704
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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When I married my wife, after a while I noticed that she

Customer Question

When I married my wife, after a while I noticed that she used to verbally abuse her parents and treat them like shit. She was however quite nice to me and other people. At that time I felt I should still say to her that there are boundaries in how you
treat anyone. I thought it was none of my business how she treats her parents and how she is super angry with them always over trivial issues too. Now after 7 years of marriage I am feeling that it was wrong move. Now her anger and verbal abuse has shifted
to me and now she would get angry about trivial issues and get angry in in-appropriate proportions. E.g. After celebrating 2nd year birthday of my daughter, my parents who were visiting asked me for few photos to share with friends. My wife had told me not
to give the 600 photos till she had trimmed down bad photos or duplicate ones. She had already deleted 200 such photos and I additionally deleted 100 more duplicate or bad photos. On my parent request for 4-5 photos to share on FB, I passed them the select
photos without asking my wife as she had been taking too long to finalize everything (and she is always sleeping till late in day). Her response was "you bastard liar....$%^%, don't talk to me and I will not talk to you parents". This is just one example,
but her anger which used to be directed toward her parents in past is now fully focused on me. There are some good weeks but her anger issue is quickly escalating. What can I do to improve this ? I do not want an answer of type "please leave her" as we have
a kid together.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Jen Helant replied 2 years ago.
Hi,I am so sorry you are going through this. Have you ever discussed her anger issues with her that she has towards you or her parents? Do you know if he was wver abused or mistreated by anyone as a child? Did she have a healthy up bringing and family life growing up?