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Dr. Bonnie
Dr. Bonnie, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2189
Experience:  Experienced in counseling all age persons on relationship issues.
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I was in a casual "relationship" with a coworker for about

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I was in a casual "relationship" with a coworker for about 5 months. I really liked him and although I knew that we didn't have a future together, I figured at the very least, we were friends. Well he decided at month 5 that it was over and never said anything to me about bit. He just cut me off cold turkey. Acted as if I never existed. As you can imagine this was extremely hurtful given the fact that I had to see him at work each day. I was devastated and found it hard to believe that someone could be so cruel. Anyway I found out from my coworkers that he got back with his ex and they moved in together. Fast forward 8 months later I'm over it (for the most part), and he has gradually started speaking to me again but I am extremely uncomfortable around him and wonder if he ever realizes how cold, heartless and cowardly he behaved, if he possibly regrets it and if he'll ever apologize. He has to have a conscience in there somewhere, right?

Hello and thank you for consulting JA, Oh dear... you are in a bind.
You said "I'm over it (for the most part)"

So.... the part of you that is not over it would like him to apologize. You are still feeling hurt and angry with him as you see him as having no regrets or conscience. You have to work at "not thinking about it". His behavior (starting to talk to you again) is causing a little post-traumatic stress by reminding you of the hurt.

He has already declared himself as a shallow, uncaring person or the other possibility is a very jealous girlfriend who is not allowing any form of communication with you. He is not worth your time or energy. Time to really move on. Pay attention to your discomfort and you may need to avoid interaction with him at work or at least, stick to business.

Hope this helps bring some clarity to the situation...
Warm regards,

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