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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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my sister hurt my feeling very badly 2 years ago and hasnt

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my sister hurt my feeling very badly 2 years ago and hasn't spoken to me since. ive sent her emails in the past and she ignores them too. im not interested in fixing our relationship anymore because I didn't do anything wrong and now that she took it one step further and cut me out of her life I don't want anything to do with her. how do I resolve my hurt feelings. if I write her a letter I don't think she will read it and I don't want her to get enjoyment out of it which I think she does. how do you resolve hurt feelings of betrayal when the person who betrayed you wont accept what they did to you
Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear friend,

I believe that I can help you.

What you need at this point is closure. You cannot make your sister act like a kind and caring adult, and perhaps you cannot get closure with her anymore.

I recommend a 2 stage approach.

First sit down and slowly compose a letter to her. Take your time. Do it over days or even longer. You can do it on the keyboard but ultimately you will want to write it by hand and sent it with an old favorite photo of you and her together or one of your entire family together.

Tell her that you just want to get closure for yourself from the hurt you have felt from someone you thought who would be there throughout your life. Tell her that you are sorry for the loss, but accecpt it, and that no matter what happens, you are her sister and will always love her.

You may not feel that way at the moment, and may never again, but you shoulld be positive.

Tell her farewell and that perhaps you will meet on the other side. WIsh her a good life, and when you are satsified that the letter is as good as you can get it, then write it by hand on nice stationery and send it to her, perhaps with a whiff of some scent on it, just to give it more presence.

Then forget about it.

In the meantime, I urge you to purchase the following workbook on thought-stopping, and go through the exercises in order to strengthen youself and steel yourself from these sad thoughts.

Perhaps your sister will grow up one day and ask for your forgiveness. In the meanwhile, do the best to keep her out of your thoughts, and not live on hopes that may never occur.

Thoughts and Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life by McKay, Matthew, XXXXX, XXXXX and Fanning, Patrick



I wish you great healing and shall keep you in my prayers.


Warm regards,




Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I will get the book but writing my sister a nice letter like that will not make me feel better it will not be sincere and I always in the past have been nice and forgiving to those that hurt me and they go on to stab me in the back. I don't want anything to do with anyone that hurts me anymore and being nice to them when they continue to hurt me only shows that I have no self-respect because I didn't for many years, but I will definetly get the book and forget about her. thank you

Dear XXXXXann,

You should always go with your feelings. There is another therapeutic trick and that is to write a letter expressing all of your feelings and anger. Get out as much as you can on paper, and then burn the letter. You may include a picture of her or the two of you together.

This is a way of unloading some of the feelings and works quite well for many.

If this is not suitable for you then just get the book and work on keeping those feelings out.

I wish you great success. You certainly deserve peace of mind.

Warm regards,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

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