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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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Hi, Im 28yr old male and have been single for over 10 years.

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I’m 28yr old male and have been single for over 10 years. I am looking to get some closure on this because it's really affecting my self confidence and self esteem, hindering me from moving forward with my dating life.

Over the last few months, I have taken two girls out on dates. With the first girl, when we met she showed me a lot of signs of interest. I picked up on it, and approached her, and we started talking and laughing. I got her number and we kept texting each other for a week, and I asked her out. We had heaps of fun, talking about ourselves and laughing. She texted back and said she had heaps of fun. We kept texting a few more days after that, and I asked her out on another date. Then our texting came to a grinding halt. When this happens, I usually wait another couple of days to text her back, and if she doesn’t then I assume she’s not interested anymore.

A couple of weeks later, I met another girl at a colleague’s house party. I got talking to her. Things went really well, we were in a relaxed mood, comfortable with each other. I got find out more about her and she got to find out more about me, laughing in our conversations. She walked, and soon after her sister came up to me to tell that the girl I was talking to thought I was very handsome and loved my personality. She told me to ask her sister out. So I took the opportunity and I asked her out. Over the week, we were texting each other like crazy. I took her out, our first date was a blast, we got to known each other more, we held hands and we made out. We both had heaps of fun agreed to another date. We continued to text each other over the next few days, but again this girl just suddenly stopped texting.

These two instances are only the most recent examples but not the only ones, I’ve had this happen to me countless times and hence why I’m still single. I'm confused and I frustrate myself trying to figure out what went wrong, and if it was me and what I need to be doing better.

Can you shed me some light on this, and build my confidence back into dating again.
Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear friend,

I believe that I can help you with this situation.

I know that you think that this is something you did wrong, but it seems as if there may be other outside factors in play in these two cases.

I any case, there are ways to MAXIMIZE your positive impact on women.

Things have become very complicated and different in the last 10 years or so in the dating world. It is not so much an issue of confidence, but of undestanding the new rules of the road.

Here is a wonderful book for you. I have the Collins Book Link is Australia but you can probably find it nearer.

How to Date in a Post-dating World

by Diane Mapes

and from the same source this excellent and helpful book:

The Everything Self-Esteem Book: Boost Your Confidence, Achieve Inner Strength, and Learn to Love Yourself

by Sherfield, Robert M.

I know that you can overcome your self doubt and perhaps your miscommunications.

I wish you great success and shall keep you in my prayers.

Warm regards,


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