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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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Hi Dr Paige If we keep working at the relationship what would

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Hi Dr Paige
If we keep working at the relationship what would be signs that she is ready for commitment or additional signs she is not?
She should first of all be able to listen to your concerns and even if she disagrees with them, be able to compromise with actions. This works both ways of course in any relationship. My concern with your situation specifically was that she just shut you down and reacted by getting angry. This wasn't a small matter to bicker about, but one where it should be blatantly obvious to her that her actions are harming the relationship. The defensive reaction she had is a tell tale sign that she knows she shouldn't be doing this, but feels strongly about it.
If you stand your ground on legitimate issues such as what you wrote about, she should start to give in a bit and at the very least meet you half way with finding the solution in order to get things back on track.
You may be showing some lack of confidence which she is honing in on and taking advantage of. If you gain that confidence in yourself and show her that you know what you expect from her in the relationship, she should begin to see that if she doesn't change her behavior, she will lose you. IF she continues to resist, then you will see she is not ready to be mature enough to be in a a committed relationship.
I would recommend sitting down with her and completely re evaluating the relationship. Tell her where you are and what you expect from her and ask her what she expects from you. Do a personal "check in" with each other to make sure you are still on the same page and are able to go forward together.
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