So I met this guy a month ago through mutual friends. We’re both in different colleges (I’m a freshman and he’s an exchange student) but since we’ve met, we’ve been hanging out a lot with our friends as a group (average of 3-5x a week). We’ve gone out alone once but that’s cause everyone bailed on us. However when do hang out in a group we pretty much stick to each other all the time.
Our “relationship” is weird cause we’re not even casually dating (let alone official) nor are we “just friends” or even friends with benefits. We are really really close though. We’ve kissed, cuddled, made out, held hands in public (and in front of our friends), etc. but never had sex. Everyone thinks we're together even though we're not. I’ve spent a few nights with him when we didn’t even do anything (we didn’t even kiss) but talked and cuddled until one of us fell asleep. Our conversations are really deep and we talk about everything. We text pretty regularly when we don’t see each other. However we were at a house party once and someone asked us if we were together and he was so quick and sure to say "no" (while having his arm around me).
I didn’t know he saw me as more than a friend until he held my hand one night. He has never flirted with me verbally or said anything sweet, he just shows affection through his actions - even now he has never said anything remotely 'sweet' or 'romantic'. The thing is, he's leaving at the end of the year and move back to his home state (which is on the other side of the country). He has mentioned a few times that he really misses home.
He broke up with his long-term girlfriend right before he left to my college (he still remains best friends with her. I know this not because he told me because he didn't mention anything about his ex, but through Facebook and his roommate/best friend who is also my good friend) but we didn't meet each other until almost halfway through the semester. I’m afraid I might just be a rebound (although he’s not using me for sex, he could be using me for company). I know we don’t have a future together (which sucks cause I’ve never liked anyone as much as I like him) but I just need your opinion.
At least if I know he genuinely likes me I’ll make the most of the time we do have together and if he doesn’t then I could put an end to this before I get too emotionally attached to him without him even feeling the same way.
When we first met, he promised to go to a concert with me before Christmas but has since seemed to have "forgotten" about it. Now he wants to go on a month-long holiday with his best friend before going back to his home state (instead of spending more time with me) and had a choice to prolong his exchange but declined. I've only brought up the concert once before he mentioned his holiday plans but haven't brought it up since. Recently he said he might be going on holiday before the date of the concert (without mentioning the actual concert), which is a red flag to me since he obviously doesn't seem to care (he knows it's my favorite band). He has also never asked me out on a date. Although some of the signs he’s showing might suggest he’s genuinely into me, a couple of them prove otherwise, hence why I’m so confused right now.
It’s even more complicated because guys have been asking me out on dates and I haven’t gone on any partly because this guy and I are pretty exclusive – he’s not seeing anyone else nor does he like anyone else (his roommate/best friend verified that. Just to be clear I’m good friends with his roommate too) – plus, I’m not really that into them as much as I'm into this guy. I figured I have a short time with him and want to make the most out of the time we have together, yet the guys that have been asking me out on dates are not on exchange and if he doesn’t feel the same way about me (even temporarily) I feel like I’m pushing away 'potentials.'
1. Does he genuinely really like me or is he just seeking temporary company (not necessarily MY company) because he doesn't have his girlfriend by his side and is homesick? He obviously has SOME level of interest but I'm afraid I like him way more than he likes me (although I do keep it cool).
2. Assuming he does like me, why do you think he wants to go on a one-month long holiday abroad with his best friend instead of spending more time with me in this state? He also declined to prolong his exchange but he says it's due to his financial constraints (which I can understand) PLUS he's planning to go on holiday before the concert we were supposed to go to without mentioning the concert. Surely he couldn't have forgotten it?
3. Why hasn't he asked me to go out with him alone? We do end up alone most of the time after hanging out with our friends but it never starts off that way. Like I said, it has only happened once. If the gender roles were reversed I'd definitely be asking him out alone (casually) at least once a week.
4. What do you feel about the fact that he broke up with his ex of 2 years only 3 months ago and then jumping straight into this "thing" with me?
Your help will be much appreciated!