My name isXXXXX am sending you this because I am
Hello, My name isXXXXX am sending...
My name isXXXXX am sending you this because I am in pain and I want to help myself heal and become the happy person I was before all this started with me. It hasn't been long in fact, but I lost my focus, I am eating all day long, can't smile or laugh from the bottom of my heart as I used to do. I need an action plan not a pep talk please.
In brief, I was betrayed and fooled and deceived by a man who pretended to be in love with me. I know maybe you heard this a lot. But let me first give you a background that will help you assess my situation and give me the best advise you have.
I am a Muslim lady and I am 34 years old. I work as HR Coordinator in a bid oil and gas company and I am studying my MBA part time sponsored by my company. This guy also works in the same company and he is also studying with me in this MBA and this is how we met. We met in June 2013 when we started studying, we at first were only friends and had fun together and I enjoyed our relation as it was. But later he started moving it to next levels, he expressed his love. He bombarded me with his feelings and I loved how he loved me. He in fact made me fly in the sky with his love. He explained that he was married and had 3 kids and that he was having problems with his wife and might come to an end. little by little i started having feelings for him and felt I am falling in love, he was my day and night. I was his day and night, if we didn't talk on the phone we texted all day long on whatsapp. then he proposed to me and said that he wants to marry me. this was towards the end of Aug. He actually proposed 4 times, he started asking me how many kids I want, Where I want to go to the honeymoon...etc. Then he told me that he told his wife that he wants divorce. His mom objected and troubles started happening in the family. It was then that I felt that he started pulling away. of course i had no proof that this was all true except his words. one day he told me that he got transferred to Yanbu, a city that is very far away from where we live and he started asking me questions on what are we going to do? I told him that if he is going to be commuting then there is no problem. He started talking like this is taking this as an excuse. He kept telling me everyday that he is trying with his mom to accept our marriage, then he said that he decided to bypass her and move forward and come meet my parents. He told me to talk to my parents. I asked him when shall i do that? He said anytime u want. So when i talked to my parents, they said let him come we meet him and we take it from there. My dad suggested the next Friday. When i told him this over whatsapp, he only sent me happy faces, then did not reply to the suggested date. I waited two days but he never replied, i came up with an excuse to my parents till i figure out what's wrong with him. I called him and he had no good reason. All what he said was that his transfer mixed up things for him and that he still wants me and that he was surprised with assigning a date from our side and it was a big step in the muddle of a crisis that he is having!! He means of course the transfer.
I had a big fight with him, that he shouldn't have asked me to involve my family if this was his position, he said that i shouldn't be upset cuz now i did the right thing, i told my family. So even my family should not be upset. In our traditions it is not acceptable that a girl knows a man before marriage.
Anyway since then he continued to pull away, at the same time continued telling me from time to time that he still feels the same towards me and he doesn't want this to be the end.
I believed him and started acting as usual, i check on him, get him his favourite candy but he ignored that and kept pulling away and not contact me for a whole day. Then he went to Yanbu, i wished all the best, XXXXX XXXXX this was the end esprcially that he told me that his wife was back to thier house!
When he was in Yanbu, he started trying to have contact with me again. My interpretation was that he was bored in Yanbu alone and wants someone to keep him company. In this case who is better than me cuz he knows i loved him. I did not answer him and when we met the week after in class, he acted like he is upset and did not talk to me at all. His friend told me that these r games that they pull on women. His friend also told me that he is sure that he will never come to meet my parents and he was lying and carried it to the extreme which he shouldn't. He told me if u want just don't tslk to him and see what would he do. Or u can confront him and see what would he say.
I couldn't wait, so i confronted him , or at least tried on whatsapp. He kept beating around the bush and never answered a single question. He insisted we talk on the phone. When we talked on the phone, at first, we greeted each other and cut some jokes, then when we started talking about serious stuff, he hung up the phone! I waited and called. To continue