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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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I have a question, Yesterday, was the first night at let my

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I have a question, Yesterday, was the first night I let my 2 year spend the night by her dad's home. The problem is the lines of communication are not open. I have to text and call and then call his girlfriend regarding the baby. I spoke with him yesterday what she was doing, and I briefly talked to him today, I explain " I need the lines of communication open and I have been calling and texting and you have yet to respond", so he said I call you. I said, "yes, yesterday, yesterday I didn't know If you had any plans with her today but I will be on that side today , so I pick her up". So he said I am not home we are by my mom. He also made a comment,What do you think I will steal her. I told him don't play with me no matter who she is I keep in contact with the person who watches her regardless. What should I do? I am tempted to tell him it will be awhile before she sleeps over again, because of his lack of communication .

Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear concerned mother.

I believe that I can help.

You are perfectly right. You cannot be expected to give up your emotional comfort level. You are having some separation anxiety about this, and it is something that is natural because you are the mother.

He probably won't steal her, BUT he must respect your feelings about this matter.

He should be providing child support for her and he should be giving her good parenting and providing decent grandparents as well. This will be good for your daughter if her experiences are positive.

Nevetheless, you feelings are important too and therefore you should tell him how you feel and what the groundrules are for visitation. He should abide by your feelings. If he sees her as a privilege that you grant then you can make rules. If this is court-ordered he just has to follow the court's rules.

He should accommodate you and if he won't you will have to exercise whatever rights you have in this situation.

Warm regards,

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