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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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i have a problem i keep texting girls and asking them if they

Customer Question

i have a problem i keep texting girls and asking them if they think im gay . i tell them i got drunk and slept with a guy and ask them if they think im gay or not. ive also been on here b4 and asked the same question . how do i stop
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 4 years ago.
Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear friend,

I believe I can help with your situation.

I understand that this is something that happened when you were drunk and you do not feel that you are gay. However, you feel so much guilt over the incident that you keep punishing yourself by sabotaging your relationship.

As soon as you text a woman asking them about this, they will think that you ARE gay, and may also think that you have some sexually transmitted disease, and will also thinkg that you are not a good potential boyfriend or safe lover.

You are shooting yourself in the foot with this obsessive thought and the corresponding compulsive behavior. This is obsessive compulsive behavior and you can stop it either by getting therapy, or quite possiblyo using a good self-help book.

Let me suggest an excellent one for you which you can order from

Break Free from OCD: Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with CBT by Dr. Fiona Challacombe, Dr. Victoria Bream Oldfield and Paul M Salkovskis


If you can do it on your own, stop the letters. If you cannot, this book will help you.


You will be fine. You are not gay, it seems, so try to move on with your life and get over this one-time incident and don't let it define you.


Warm regards,



Customer: replied 4 years ago.

thank you for your answer you have helped me alot with this answer and i will try the book. one thing i didnt mention is i tried it twice after i was drunk with two different people but felt bad for doing it after each time. i split up with my gf over it because i told her what happened . i keep doing it with every girl i get with


Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 4 years ago.
Dear friend,

You are a very sexually charged man. You become very uninhibited when you drink so keep that in mind. Get the book and enjoy the women.

Warm regards,

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

hahah thanks i will do


Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 4 years ago.
You are very welcome, my friend.

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Customer: replied 4 years ago.

ive asked the quetion again i just want to get a second opinion. i text a girl and told her and she told me get a second opinion

Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 4 years ago.
Sounds great. Two heads are better than one (usually).

I wish you great success