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Im not sure if Im in the right place or not but here goes: Im…

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I'm not sure if I'm...
I'm not sure if I'm in the right place or not but here goes:
I'm having a serious mental breakdown, and the stress feels overwhelming.

I started seeing this girl that was in my previous work back in august 2012 when she was house sitting, the very first encounter was to say the least intimate. I haven't been in a relationship before and when I told her that she was all over me, I wasn't sure what happened. We started hanging out more in the months later, as far as I know I thought she was single and had my expectations that we were dating. Fast forward to February, I've been seeing texts in her phone from another person that was in the building (I know because he was the training officer) the entire time that I was with her. Until I saw a text from the same guy that says "I love you" and that he has made plans for then on February 14. Before that day, I told her, its either him or me, unfortunately she chose me. She didn't tell me anything, even after that day we didn't really talk about it as much. I also realized as well that she just got out from a 5 year relationship, so maybe she's not ready for another serious relationship?
Fast forward to April, she started texting more and more to a guy that is apparently currently siting beside her, where I used to sit (I left the company in December). Emails, chat, texts, it was all over her phone and when I asked about him, she just said that they're "friends". I later realized that on the only day that I didn't see her that she cheated on me with the same guy and they were emailing each other at work and in her personal email how "hot" it was and how they would like to do it differently next time.
I broke down when I saw the series of emails, for the first time in my life I actually cared enough about someone.
Such a naive person I am, I still went through this relationship because maybe there's something else left in there to save. Even though that happened, they were still emailing, texting each other for at least the month later. I forgave her for what happened but its so hard to trust her and its really killing me inside. I haven't felt stress like this before where I feel paranoid to the point that I have to know everything about what she's doing. To make matters worse, I moved in with her just so that I can keep a close look.

I don't know why I'm doing this to myself. I just feel like sometimes I don't want to go back to what my life what before her.
Submitted: 5 years ago.Category: Relationship
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9/5/2013
Counselor: Dr. Paige, Psychologist replied 5 years ago
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1,427
Experience: Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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Customer reply replied 5 years ago

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