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My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half,

the whole time he did...
My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half, the whole time he did not have any income because he was an intern on Wall St. As of yesterday, he moved into a paid position, and I am feeling really insecure that he will leave me now that he has "options". He is more of a partyer, and I am more introverted/stay at home and read girl, and I feel like he will be happier with more of a party girl. He and I have known each other for 20 years (he is one of my brothers friends), and he said he had a crsh on me for 20 years. He gets upset whenever I tell him that I think he will be happier with someone more like him, and he wants to marry me. I am 33 and he is 31.

I grew up in a very verbally abusive home, so I know I struggle with self-worth issues. I really want to stay away from unsafe/verbally abusive people, and in the past 2 months I have had some upheaval in my life. The verbal abusers (my parents, brothers, and a couple of their nosy friends) have been very insulting of me while I have been down. My bf is very supportive/loving, and it seems "to good to be true" after being the disrespected scapegoat/black sheep in my family for so long.
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Answered in 13 minutes by:
9/4/2013
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7,664
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
Verified
Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear friend,

The years of abuse have hurt your self-esteem. You are with a man who loves you and wants to marry you.

You are blessed. Don't give him any more negative talk.

Celebrate with him and don't let yourself think that this is your downfall.

You can be defeated by this negative self-talk and feeling of being unworthy of him.

This is a time for growth.

Let me recommend an excellent self-help workbook for you:


Product Details

Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem... by Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning

 

Celebrate your life with this man. Get married, and live happily ever after. Be positive and learn how to improve your self-esteen. It will make a world of difference.

 

I wish you great success and happiness, and shall keep you in my prayers.

 

Warm regards,

 

Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC

 

 

Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7,664
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
Verified
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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7,664
7,664 Satisfied Customers
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.

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