Relationship

Have Relationship Questions? Ask a Counselor for Answers ASAP

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

Hello. I broke a guys heart 9 years ago when I told him he…

Customer Question
Hello. I broke a guy's...
Hello. I broke a guy's heart 9 years ago when I told him he was nothing and had nothing going for himself. I was madly in love with him, I just let other ppl get in my head, I was just 14yrs old. He walked away and never spoke to me again. I've carried the guilt with me for years and recently (4 days ago) I tried to reach out to him via Facebook asking him to call me asap and sent him a request as well.I wanted to see how he was doing, catch up and let him know how sorry I am and that I didn't mean what Isaid I was just pressured bc I was a suburb girl and everyone thought he was no good including his mother who would always put him down, he was from the wrong side of the tracks.But when I got to know him I saw how intelligent he was and how much he wanted to become something in life he just wasn't in an motivating environment, nobody to motivate him. Our chemistry was so perfect. I was so in love, we were so in love, but everyone around me said, "oh you're 14 u don't know what love is and it's puppy love." Well I'm 23 now and I can honestly say it was love. I think about it and I feel it burning inside of me again. There have been very few men who've made me feel that deep gut burning love.But anyway bringing it back to my point. I reached out to him and he never responded but he received it. About 2 weeks later at 6:45am he tries to tag my profile pic to his page but I'm asked by fb to approve it. I say no because he hasn't responded to me nor has he accepted my request. Later that night he finally writes back but he's calling me out of my name and asking me if he even knows me.Of course he does as we have 17 mutual friends on there and I tell him who I am anyway and I add that he doesn't need to disrespect me. I then tell him that I wasn't trying to offend him or start anything so I'm gonna just leave him alone and I apologize. He reads it and he doesn't respond.I know I hurt him really badly but I didn't think after 9 years he would still have a vendetta against me. This tells me that he must still be hurt and is showing anger cuz that's how it comes out.So to me I'm thinking he must still cares.All I wanted was to tell him how sorry I am and that I really did love him. I would also tell him things that he didn't know like how after he walked away I sat down for a minute and felt like I made a huge mistake and I went to go after him but he was already gone and I didn't know where he went. I waited for months for him to come back. He wouldn't answer my calls and when I did see him a few months after the incident he would not listen to me, he literally ignored me and at the time I was just trying to make small talk, figuring I would wait until my aunt wasn't around to explain to him bc she was one of the ppl who told me I shouldn't be with him.I feel so awful and like I just gotta talk to him...I have to get this off of my chest bc all i do is think about it...idk what to do. Please give me some advice
Submitted: 4 years ago.Category: Relationship
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Relationship Question
Answered in 2 hours by:
9/3/2013
Counselor: Dear Debra, Advice Columnist replied 4 years ago
Dear Debra
Dear Debra, Advice Columnist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1,852
Experience: I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
Verified
This answer is protected
Would you like to ask this question?
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.
Was this answer helpful?

How JustAnswer works

step-image
Describe your issueThe assistant will guide you
step-image
Chat 1:1 with a counselorLicensed Experts are available 24/7
step-image
100% satisfaction guaranteeGet all the answers you need
Ask Dear Debra Your Own Question
Dear Debra
Dear Debra
Dear Debra, Advice Columnist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1,852
1,852 Satisfied Customers
Experience: I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.

Dear Debra is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help.

Mary C.Freshfield, Liverpool, UK

This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!!

AlexLos Angeles, CA

Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult.

GPHesperia, CA

I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion.

JustinKernersville, NC

Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around.

EstherWoodstock, NY

Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know.

RobinElkton, Maryland

He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here.

DianeDallas, TX

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

TherapistMaryAnn

TherapistMaryAnn

Counselor

1,744 satisfied customers

Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues

Ms Chase

Ms Chase

Life Coach

853 satisfied customers

Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues

Alicia_MSW

Alicia_MSW

Psychotherapist

468 satisfied customers

Specializing in relationship/family counseling

Dr. Norman Brown

Dr. Norman Brown

Marriage Therapist

427 satisfied customers

Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples

DrJackiePhD

DrJackiePhD

Doctor

385 satisfied customers

I have been doing research in relational/interpersonal communication since 1998. My Ph.D. is in interpersonal communication.

Dr. L

Dr. L

Psychologist

366 satisfied customers

Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.

Suzanne

Suzanne

Therapist, LCSW

338 satisfied customers

Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency

< Previous | Next >

Related Relationship Questions
My ex and I dated for a 1 yr 1/2. It was amazing. Towards
My ex and I dated for a 1 yr 1/2. It was amazing. Towards our 1 year anniversary, we argued a lot. On the last fight, I left for a week to spend a planned trip with my family. He and I barely talked, … read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
961 satisfied customers
Hello. I broke a guys heart 9 years ago when I told him he
Hello. I broke a guy's heart 9 years ago when I told him he was nothing and had nothing going for himself. I was madly in love with him, I just let other ppl get in my head, I was just 14yrs old. He w… read more
Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark
Doctoral Degree
129 satisfied customers
We dated 6 mths ago. After the 3rd, he went thru a freak-out
We dated 6 mths ago. After the 3rd, he went thru a freak-out stage because of a misunderstanding. 2 mths later, he texted me saying he misses me and wants to meet. Later explained why the sudden inter… read more
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Adjunct Professor
Master's Degree
1,014 satisfied customers
Ive been with my boyfriend for two years and we are very serious.
I've been with my boyfriend for two years and we are very serious. He's wonderful and treats me very well. The only problem is me, I'm preoccupied with his past relationships. He dated someone serious… read more
Jen Helant
Jen Helant
Bachelor\u0027s Degree
365 satisfied customers
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 years ever
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 years ever since we met at work and we still work together to this day. After about 8 months, we got engaged and shortly after, he moved into my small… read more
psychlady
psychlady
Clinical Director
Master\u0027s Degree
3,517 satisfied customers
well back in January his ex girlfriend wanted to be friends
well back in January his ex girlfriend wanted to be friends with him on facebook and I was iffy about it and I asked him about her and he said they r talking which I figured just on Facebook after all… read more
Kevin Kappler
Kevin Kappler
Clinical Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
353 satisfied customers
I need to set free of bitter feelings towards others who have
I need to set free of bitter feelings towards others who have done me wrong this year & last year. Due to they attend my church, when they try to talk to me or are around me, I just look at them with … read more
psychlady
psychlady
Clinical Director
Master\u0027s Degree
3,517 satisfied customers
I feel insure bc of what my ex boyfriend did to me not with
I feel insure bc of what my ex boyfriend did to me not with my current one. The 2nd one ended up going toward another woman bc she was willing to give him money and I wasn't bc I didn't want to be use… read more
Lori Gephart
Lori Gephart
President/Licensed Psychologist
Master\u0027s Degree
88 satisfied customers
I have 2 issues with a male Christian friend who is over 50
I have 2 issues with a male Christian friend who is over 50 years old and widower. Several months ago, his dad died. He came to pick me up with another female friend for the funeral. He charged me gas… read more
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Counseling Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
449 satisfied customers
My male best friend stated that when he met me he thought I
My male best friend stated that when he met me he thought I was one way and ended up being another. What I mean is that he didn't realize how intelligent and kind of work my dad had done in his past. … read more
Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi
Doctoral Degree
1,564 satisfied customers
What is wrong with the men these days They sob for the woman
What is wrong with the men these days? They sob for the woman who treated them badly either abuse, cheating or didn't do much for them. If they sob for this kind of woman, that says to be they don't e… read more
Bonnie
Bonnie
Doctoral Degree
200 satisfied customers
My dad feels that Im being taken for a ride by a male Christian
My dad feels that I'm being taken for a ride by a male Christian friend of mine. He came to get me out of his way yesterday to take me to his dad's funeral. He charged me $10 for gas. Dad feels this w… read more
Angela
Angela
Counselor
490 satisfied customers
Ive enough living with my parents for the past 3 yrs. Im
I've enough living with my parents for the past 3 yrs. I'm 41 and had to move in due to chronic depression. I couldn't live alone. this was my only choice. Now, I'm better to move on my own. Due to th… read more
Anna
Anna
Clinical Supervisor
Master\u0027s Degree
232 satisfied customers
Need to break the cycle of attracting abusive and controlling
Need to break the cycle of attracting abusive, controlling people and ppl disrespect me in other ways too. Believe me at first the signs are not there with 1st meeting especially if met with others. G… read more
Angela
Angela
Counselor
490 satisfied customers
I met a Christian guy over a year ago. Its just friendship.
I met a Christian guy over a year ago. It's just friendship. I have no other feelings than that for this guy. I went to a church event during the July 4th weekend from Thursday till Monday. The entire… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
396 satisfied customers
I was in a serious relationship that began on 11/09. It took
I was in a serious relationship that began on 11/09. It took me a while to trust and commit to this man. He waited patiently. Right when I committed, the nightmare started. We lost touch for 2 weeks d… read more
Anna
Anna
Clinical Supervisor
Master\u0027s Degree
232 satisfied customers
My boyfriend had been on an off for a year. He then again
My boyfriend had been on an off for a year. He then again broke up with a month ago. But he still text me that he loves me and misses me. When he call he would tell me that he got out of a bad divorce… read more
KimberlyF
KimberlyF
High School or GED
554 satisfied customers
I dated Lance for about a year. This was 7 months ago..and
I dated Lance for about a year. This was 7 months ago..and we ended on bad terms. we aggrevated eachother & i think we just needed our space. He slept with one of my friends... not a good friend...but… read more
KimberlyF
KimberlyF
High School or GED
554 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x