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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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Stalking? Harassment? I have an ex boyfriend I broke up

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Stalking? Harassment?

I have an ex boyfriend I broke up over and he was mad of course. He knew I cheated on him over a guy at my job. He and I are friends on Facebook still and he can see my pictures. I posted a picture of my new boyfriend on there and I did it becuse he kept placing pictures of his life and happiness just to try to make me feel bad.

The guy I am dating and in a relationship with works at my job and there is a policy in place that forbids office relationships or office romance. I don't get a along well with a lot of co-workers and they may know about my current "fling" in the office. At one time, a lady got me in trouble because I left my computer screen up and she informed my boss. So this is a toxic environment.

Anyhow, somebody sent an email to my boss at work and a shared inbox of the pictures I posted of my current partner and I together who works there and I'm not sure how much trouble I could be in since the policy forbids it. But I am so sure it was my ex because he is jealous. But I can't prove it because the email he sent was not his direct email address, but a weird account so he wouldn't disclose his name. My boss wants to meet with me in a couple days about it. What should I do?
Hello. You need to cut all contact with your ex,including blocking him from Facebook. If he is causing these problems now, he isn't interested in having a respectful friendship with you and will probably do it again. AS far as your work situation, there isn't a whole lot you CAN do about that now. If people already know, your boss was sent the pictures, you can't go back and take any of that away. You are unfortunately, going to have to face the music on that one and go meet with your boss in a few days and have the talk. Unless you can convince him you are both just friends and not seriously involved ( I don't know the nature of the photos) then you and your current boyfriend need to discuss what is about to happen and how to handle it. Unfortunately, I don't think you have a lot of options here given what has already transpired and your inability to change it. Speak with your current boyfriend and come up with a plan on how to handle the conversation with your boss.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Thank you. About 2 weeks ago, my ex sends my current bf a message about me and talking bad about me also. Can I get him for stalking or harassment? He lives in Maryland I am in Virginia. My ex basically told him that about all the problems I have and how I am clinically depressed since I do have a medical issue, but then again whoever it was that told my current partner this did not reveal his name.


Can I get him for slander or something?

Unfortunately, I don't think you can get him for harassment based on that incident and the work email incident. You would have to contact a lawyer or look into the state law to know for sure, but based on my experience, I believe it has to be much more than that. I would make sure that you have a great relationship with your current partner and make sure that you are both communicating about all of this. Most importantly, you need to be very strongly on the same team to make sure that no one or anything can put a rift in between you two. This includes your boss. If you have a strong relationship, then fight for it and make sure that it can withstand rumors and pitfalls from all angles. I would consider changing your emails and blocking on fb and taking all of those precautions for both you and your current partner.
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