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Dr. Bonnie
Dr. Bonnie, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2189
Experience:  Experienced in counseling all age persons on relationship issues.
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my question is i had a relationship with a girl. we talked

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my question is i had a relationship with a girl. we talked on the phone for six months exchanged photos and phone numbers. she lives in somalia and i live in the us. one day while i was talking to her i asked about the dowry money i will give her when we are getting married then she changed the tone and yelled at me saying to me u need to give 10 thousand dollars. i told her i can't afford that then she said if u can't goodbye. we didn't talk after that. Today her family talked to me and said to me she wasn't the person who yelled they said it was her sister. iam confused now and i don't know what wil i do?
Hello and thank you for consulting JA,
It is possible that this is a scam just to get your money. If you have never met in person, it is even more likely a scam. You should report this to

They will be able to tell you if she is real or not.

I am sorry that you have gone through this humiliation but very glad that you did not send money.

Warm regards,

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

but this is someone i know we are cousins


Okay since you are sure it is her....I would talk to her and find out how she feels about your financial status. If she will not talk to you, then she is not interested in continuing the relationship. If she will talk to you, you and she can straighten things out and continue your relationship. Hopefully the family is okay with the dowry situation. You need some clarification of the situation and it can only come from her.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

is it possible that her family are telling the truth that she lost her phone and her sister were using the sim card. even her mother called me crying and sweared to me what is telling is true. what can i do about this situation?

It is possible that her family is telling the truth. Her mother seems to be very concerned so she must approve of the relationship. But the only way to know for sure is to communicate with need to talk to her. If she will not talk with you, then the mother needs to convince her to.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

she is talking to me and applogized even i heard she had a nervous breakdown but me i had a little doubt but her family approved everything and waiting for my answer do u think this relationship could go on? this my first time marrying someone.

If girlfriend want to marry you and if you want to marry her, then, yes the marriage should go on. I would not let the sisters behavior interfere. I would get the requirement about the dowry cleared up though so you know exactly what is expected of you.
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Customer: replied 4 years ago.

thank you very much i realy happy u cleared my mind.