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You only described the one incident with the tea kettle. You normal forgetfulness caused no harm, was not done maliciously, and should not have become an issue.
This is very destructive and aggressive behaviour and serves to blame you as somehow victimising her by the tardy boiled water. You are the bad person and she gets to scold you.
This is the trick of a narcissist. The issue is not about the event but about gaining what is called "narcissistic supply" by controlling you. She NEEDS to to this, and may do similar things to either be in control or to gain admiration for what she does.
She may not have full-blow personality issues, but she seems to be exhibitiing these traits.
A true narcissist is a natural born liar and manipulator, and worst of all, is not capable of showing empathy towards others, or feeling the pain of others.
If this is the case, then you have a difficult person on your hands, and she will not change.
You have not given me much information but this is an educated hunch.
For some detailed guidance I recommend this valued book:
by Cynthia Lechan Goodman M Ed & Barbara Leff Lcsw
I wish you great success in understanding your situation. This is where I would look first.
Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC