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Dr.G., Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1492
Experience:  Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota
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Im looking for some advice and ideas here. My wife and

Resolved Question:

I'm looking for some advice and ideas here.

My wife and me have been married for three years and have two children. We love each other but as she puts it, feels like we have "become room mates who are raising children together". One child is 6 and is fairly self sufficient the other is less than a year and is quite needey. We love them both to death, but they take up a majority of our free time and energy.

I work full time and run my own busienss and she stays home taking care of the children. We are feeling disconncted from each other and have lost that spark in our relationship. I don't expect to feel like a teenager in love, but I don't want to grow apart from my wife while the kids are little and demanding much of our attention that used to be spent on each other.

Obviously we need to find more ways to spend time alone away from the kids to focus on "us", which we will do but that is not always easy.

Other than suggesting just another "date night", what other ideas or suggestions could you give me that I could bring to the table to help us strengthen our marriage and relationship while it is being tested with the circumstance of having little ones and limited time and energy?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr.G. replied 4 years ago.
Don't underestimate date night. Time together is crucial. What is also crucial is time alone. You really want to WOW her? Watch the kids and let her go do her own thing.this will give her a break and really show your appreciation for her staying home with the kids. That act of kindness will start a spark in her that wool make her want to be closer to you.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
I've already been doing that and offering that quite often (staying home with the kids). I'm not discounting date night, but its not always the easiest to set up with a sitter and such. I'm looking for more ideas. Do you have any?
Expert:  Dr.G. replied 4 years ago.
It depends on what makes her happy. Gifts, time with you, time alone, affection, sweet notes, etc. the book 5 love languages may give you two some ideas.
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