I haven't had the time yet to sit and have a real prolonged talk to my ex (Susan) yet.
I had to work on the weekend, but we had a small talk on Friday when I went to pick our son up, so Susan go go out for the night.
I was supposed to take him back yesterday, but I asked if I could keep him for the night and she said she would phone him later that evening. Well, she didn't and I phoned her and she was out with her friends again.
I don't know how to feel, at the moment it's as if I don't matter to her unless I'm needed to watch our boy.
I told her on Friday that I'm beginning to get counselling (alcohol) and I'm booked in (myself only) for relationship counselling also.
She always made noises about wanting a happy and settled famiiy life (she told me this again on Friday) holidays, relaxed nights in more of a social life, no arguing and a happy household etc....
I really want to give her these things but I feel I'm now being pushed further away because she seems more interested n going out and getting drunk and enjoying herself.
I really don't know what it is she wants - she asked me to sort myself put before we can mend anything and I've made a start....I'm just desperate for her to show me some sort of sign that will give me a little bit of hope.
We've had thirteen years and a baby together and I just think that that is too much to let go of without a fight.