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Jen Helant
Jen Helant, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1386
Experience:  I have a degree in psychology and worked with many couples. I am happily married and have been for 10 years.
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My best friend broke up with her ex a year ago and 3 months

Customer Question

My best friend broke up with her ex a year ago and 3 months ago she fell in love with another guy. Now that he is away in the military, they are still "together" but she still loves her ex. Recently, her ex became a jerk and pulled her along until what he got then told her he was in a relationship. Now I am watching my best friend have her heart broken by her current boyfriend who is gone and her ex who won't take her back and is a jerk to her. what do i do?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Jen Helant replied 4 years ago.

I am sorry about what your best friend is going through. Her ex does not sound like good news and I would encourage her to not keep contact with him. The more contact she has the harder it will be for her to get passed him. Seems like when she saw him all the feelings came back. She may also be lonely because her boyfriend is not there right now. As a friend be there to talk to her, try and keep her busy, and her mind off of the situation. Like I said she will get over her ex, but it will just take time. It is best she keeps busy during this time such as maybe trying new activities and hobbies she may have not gotten a chance to do. Encourage her to use this time alone to take care of herself that way she can be in an even better spot when her boyfriend does comes back and more importantly for herself. All of these things will help her cope with the pain, but time will truly help her heal. She then needs to decide if she truly wants to wait for her boyfriend. Her feelings may not be that strong for him if she was wanting her ex. That would be a decision she would need to look inside herself and make. All you can do is your part as a friend to lift her spirits and give her sound advice. Just the fact you are here shows you are a good friend and she is lucky to have you.

Please let me know if I cam help further. I wish you and your friend all the best.

Expert:  Jen Helant replied 4 years ago.

I am not sure why you were unhappy with my answer. If you could provide feedback in order that would be wonderful. This is for me to be able to help you better. My goal is customer satisfaction.