That was good timing, I actually spoke to him last night for the first time,and I didn't realise I could have any follow up questions with you.
I was out at a party and was a little bit drunk and starting to feel a bit emotional. I messaged him and asked him to pick me up. I had told him that I wanted to see him before I went away, and then had changed my mind. At that point I thought that I wanted him to see what he had done to me, because I felt that I tend to hide my emotions and pretend to him that everything is fine, and he needs to know the consequences of his actions.
He said that he still loved me, but it seemed like he wasn't sure if getting back together was the best decision for me. He said that he is always thinking about sex (which I think is an over-reaction to what is normal for any guy), and that even though he has always felt that our relationship is enough, he can't help but think about other women. He said that he can't guarantee that he won't do this again.
It sounds like he's trying to make out that he's some sex addict, but I think he's just got a weak character, and can't hold himself up in these kinds of moments. I don't know if maybe it's just our age, I know I've always been able to hold myself up, but maybe he's just not as mature.
I told him that I wanted to try to fall in love with someone else, and see if anything changes about my feelings towards him. I always said that in a year from now in moving away, and that maybe we can think about getting back together around then.
Do you think this was a good thing to say, by raising his expectations like this? I always am kind of annoyed with myself for letting him off the hook so soon, I'm still not over punishing him for this. And do you think someone can 'outgrow' infidelity?