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SLREED, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 220
Experience:  MS Marriage/Family therapy. Four years as a counselor.
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hi im in a realationship got 2 kids and 1 step kid my girlfriend

Customer Question

hi im in a realationship got 2 kids and 1 step kid my girlfriend dont trust me always thinks im cheatin how i dont no all i do is go to work and come home i dont go out dont see anyone and i only have minor catch up with ppl i used to hang around and she gets anoyed she questions and get angry tells me to leave but she turns around sayin were u goin i say to her u told me to get my stuff and leave so she gose back on here word and dome times wen were talkin and i dont say anythin i dont like confrontation and she gets angry she pushes me kicks me and i tell her dont i mean it dont but she does it more and i retalyait and i dont like it we had an argument on sunday and it felt like i was goin to kill her thats wat she sed and i stopped cos i new it was wong basicly i had her in a head lock and was gettin tighter she even says she does it so i do somin she brings the kids into the arguments for no reason she wants everythin to go her way wen it dont shes pead off and get anoyed about everythin and every one she wants me to do a lie detceter test cos she says im liein wen im not i tell the truth just cos she had a bad past she thinks all men are the same but i dont believe in cheatin and cos i spoken to a few girls before she got mad and classes it as cheatin but i havent done anythin wrong i dont no wat to do anymore i dont want to go inside but if it kicks off like it again i dont no wat to do i tell her to stop im defendin for my self i dont like how or who i have become and wat she has become its a never endin story sorry for my spelling
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  SLREED replied 4 years ago.
Okay I am going to try to give you the best advice that I can in your situation and I am going to be honest in my assessment. I think that the relationship that you are in is very unhealthy. I know that this is not what you want to here, but one or two things needs to happen. A. End the relationship or B. Get into counseling. The thing is that she hits you, you argue and fight and there is violence involved. There is no simple answer that is going to stop this.

I understand that their are children involved, but them seeing you argue like this is not good for them. They will grow up and think that it is okay to behave this way in a relationship, because it is what they have been exposed to. And it is not. I think that it is best that you take at time out and stay elsewhere for a while. In the means time get counseling. Otherwise I do not see how the relationship can last. Remember, healthy relationships should bring you pleasure not pain and they should make you happy. There are deep rooted issues that need to be addressed here so that you two can move forward. So my answer to you is to get some space away from each other. decide if you want to be together. If you do get counseling. If not then perhaps it is better that you move on as oppose to live in this unhealthy relationship.