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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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ok here is my uneasy situation ,im a lesbian i had a girlfriend

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ok here is my uneasy situation ,im a lesbian i had a girlfriend for 6 months she is 19 im 26 ,young girls love me a lot i always had yonger girlfriends i was a dj a bartender im sexy and feminime russian girl ,but back to the point ...
My gf is working for political party of democracy and she was invited on the conference to Puerto Vallarta mexico and she could take one friend with her ,so she took me ,along with her went her friend Daniel ,he took his friend also ,her name was Alejandra ,she turned out to be a lesbian very beautiful and smart and i liked her a lot ...first time i saw kind of met her when she came down in the evening to eat with us ,we were all in the same Sheraton hotel and Daniel had his guitar and i played and she really showed interest in me ,she was smiling and this eye contact that can tel you some things too and she played guitar too ...but my girlfriend was sitting next to me so i couldnt do much ...
Later on daniel(i have to say he wasnt aware that im a lesbian,neither he knew that my gf was cause we are very fenime )and his friend that i liked they came down next day ,but my gf told me i shouldnt flirt with people so i was very closed this time with this girl ...but i was feeling she liked me...later on Daniel he expressed interest in me ,he spent a llot of time w me we were playing volleyball talking a lot and stuff like that ...
we all came on one bus and when we were coming back me and my gf were late ,so we couldnt sit toogether and she also got kind of mad with me because she was jelaous about this girl and the only sit i had was right next to daniel and her i set there daniel and her were talking to me cracking jokes she was asking me things and listening pretty close and laughing and smiling and that good stuff ...later sit that w me was empty and daniel set in it and started talking a lot of stuff ,we were listening to the music and talking like friends ,st this time his friend falled asleep and i talled him "Daniel i really like your friend i cant hold it down " he was like "wau really ,(by the way daniel has a gf too)" then he asked do you like her more or me ? wasnt in jelaous way more like a friendly playing way ,i sad "your friend but please do not tell my gf " he said do not worry and i will tell Alejandra ,she likes european girls he said and im russian ) gf was very pissed that he was sitting and taling to me but she was in the other part of autobus ,at some point of timeDaniel tool headphones of Alejandra and sayd pretend like you took it without intention and then you will have a reason to see her agai and ill tell her that you like her i was like "ok",
when autobus arrived it was a late night me and my gf and Daniel took one taxi toogether ,he kissed us goodbuy ,my gf pretended like noth happened but she was pissed next day im wrighting daniel in FB "hey how are you whats up have you talked to alejandra ?" and he was like "oh yes and she ws very interested in you and she gave her phone number so you can text or call her " and i was like wau i texted her i sayd hey how are you remeber me? and answer was "oh yes i do off caurse whats up " she sounded super excited but she was entering her class so she said "can i text you later ? cause im going inthe class " i sayd off caurse ) and she texted me around 8 pm and sayd "send me some russian music to download"i was like sure i will and the i asked her what she likes to do in her free time ? she didnt answer for a while and then she said she was playing tennis w her best friend and it was night so i didnt bother any more ...
Next day i wright Daniel on FB and say "hey whats up "(oh i forgot to mention my gf found out me and him became friends on FB and she was really mad and they work toogether )...XXXXX XXXXXing back"yes " nothing else i say "how are you today ?"
the answer from him was "?"
and then i was like
-"do u want coffee im inviting " no answer
-are you ok? no answer
are you mad for something no answer

so i texted his friend Alejandra "hey how are you ?" no answer
do you want come out and have beer this weekend ? no answer
i sent her a friend request in FB no answer ....after that my gf took headphoes that i took and gave to daniel and sayd "if you want a russian gf look in the internet and tell your friend he same "...and daniel showed his phone and sayd "look i dont need her she is texting me "....
ok after that passed one day ...and i dont know what to do IM SOOOO LIKING THIS GIRL ANDI KNOW SHE LIKED ME TOO ...i saw it in her eyes in her smile in everyth ...and she was the one who passed me her number ..and she did to her friend she ws very interested in me ...and she sounded happy when i texted her ...
so what should i do ,what can i text her what you advice me to talk to her she is a lawyer very 24 y.o. very pretty ,smart w ambitions girl ,me too lol...but what to do ?
Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective

Dear friend,

It seems that your and this lawyer are head for a relationship. If this is what you want, and you have no real commitment with your current girlfriend, then get together with the new girl. It might mean the end of your current relationship, but it does seem that this is what you want to do, whatever the consequences.

You will not be content if you let this girl go.

If you wish to get back to me on this, please do and I shall continue the conversation. I am giving you my instinctual reaction based on my understanding of relationships and of human nature.

I wish you great success.

Warm regards,

Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

yes that i all undersand...but the main part of the story this lawyer girl stopped talking to me ..she didnt except my friend request after ...she didnt respond my text messages after this first day ...neither daniel did ...i dont know what happened ...but no answer ..i really want talk to her because seems like Daniel talled her something or i have no idea how to get her to meet me ...i have her phone number but since she didnt respond my 2 messages ...what to do...what will be a good message to send what to tell her? that i like her that i want meet her i dont want appear obsessive or anyth like this to et her to meet me ?


I would write:

Dear Alejandra,

I thoroughly enjoyed your company recently at the Sheraton in Puerto Vallarta. I was very taken with your wit and intelligence. Your beauty and warm personality have totally captivated me.

I am usually more prudent than this, but forgive me for throwing all caution to the wind. I must ask you if you would consider getting together with me sometime very soon, for dinner and drinks, or just a cup of coffee, if that is your preference.

I feel that we have a strong connection, the kind that should not be ignored, because they are a rare occurrence. I know that I am being forward and hope that you don't find me foolish, but please consider my request. This could be a remarkable turning point in both of our lives, or could just be a short and pleasant meeting for one time.

I would be grateful and delighted if you accept my invitation.

In friendship,


I hope this is acceptable to you, and I wish you great fortune.

Warm regards,

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

so YOU think honesty in this case? i the best thing to do,i ve heard it better not to let people know how much yo u like them wouldnt kind of scare her ?

i think she found out i have a girlfriend and may be for this reason doesnt want do anyth with me ,if you look at her face book here is the link would you be able to say if honesty will be the best approach ?



She is a beautiful young woman.

Yes, I believe that honesty is the best policy. In this case, you are letting her know that you are not a player and that you are really taken aback by her. From her pictures she seems to be a very decent looking and open person.

As an attorney, she is probably very aware of dishonest people, the way way they speak, and the way they are not open.

I believe that an honest letter from you would have more influence than one that was less direct. Truth has a tremendous power. They say that the truth shall set you free.

I don't know what else you could say that would be more powerful.

Remember, you are only asking her to meet you for dinner, or just a coffee. She will probably be intrigued by your honesty and will want to explore the person who wrote this heartfelt and old-fashioned and sentimental letter.

Warm regards,


Customer: replied 5 years ago.

but dont you think she already scratched me from her good list cause i actually have a girl friend and trying something with her? ...or my be i misread the signals and she is not that interested to know ?

If she is interested she will accept your offer. If she is not, or does not want to because of your girlfriend, she will not. You may have misread the signals, but you will never know unless you try. Not trying or gettting a rejection are about the same. You do not have anything to lose.

Best wishes,

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

one last thing ..should i wait few days ? before sending her a message since she didnt answer ...or should i do it asap ?

Wait a few days and let her settle down. It will be more effective.

Warm regards,

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

one last thing i swear i ll rte you in the best way possible ,can you look up my face book and say what you think ab our compatibility


You too are a beautiful woman. I think that the two of you make a striking couple. Let us hope that she sees things the same way.

I certainly hope that it can succeed.

My hopes are with you.

Warm regards,