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feeling very down today.
wanted to chat for abit.
why cause its the 4th?
chat away my friend.
just in general.
feel like im not getting anywhere.
broke down and email her last week, no reply but i knew what i was doing.
yes you always feel that....but you are!
ok and eventually you will stop that
also, i broke down and had one dirnk....just one and i hated it but i feel kinda guilty.
regarding the drink, i figure its a proccess, could have been worse
not thrilled to hear that.
but im not proud of it.
nor am i,
when did that happen and was it after there was no response?
few days ago, yes after
unrelated tho i think -
hasnt your liver communicated all that needs to be communicated?
what is it related to?
yes but you need to make the connection so you can prevent it from happening again.
i havent told many ppl
will tell therapist.
but, again i feel bad about it
not a good move.
but its done.
I know you do....it didnt cause a further slide or desire for other things?
it made me sick.
it was a negative experience.
ok good to hear
i didint look at it as a replase.
but a set back.
ok and i hate that you hate aa if for nothing else to have a sponsor to reach out to
i may look into it.
overall, i dont know how i feel about it.
i know it could have been much worse.
and for that, im proud.
I look at it as support and you NEED that
i am glad for that too
Other than that.
having a hard tie with Sister
in what sense?
i feel very trapped.
Just want to sleep
and not palying with a full desk herself.
the animal hording is bothering me.
I feel worried for you....I just feel you need more support than you are getting.
i brought that up to my therapist.
hes goign to give me an hour a week now
not much but better than what it was.
im kinda doing all i can with what i have.
does he have twice per week? and no AA is still an option and I wish you would explore it more.
its a block to find reasons not to go
once a week is max.
giving you the real deal here.
a meeting a day!!!!!
heres an anaology...
you have a physical illness....
the doc gives you a med to take once per week.
he then comes back and says you need a bit more support and I need you to drink a glass of milk too and you say no the milk makes me feel worse...the doc says but it is the kind of support you need and if you are open to the glass of milk, you might feel much better.
to me it is as simple as that anaolgy.
have you had to deal with much substanec abuse in your work?
I have had my fair share....
why do you ask?
do most recover?
it is a very difficult disease with a very high relapse rate but the ones that do best are the ones that have the most support in place!!!!!!!!
you do not have enough...plain and simple.
I speak from a place of caring.
I want you to have the best chance...you deserve that.
What can I say to get you to get more support
nothing really, i need to speak with my therapist i guess
I like that idea.
can you do AA with out reg attending meetings?
or to just have a sponsor
someone to call
You need more to have the best fighting chance.
have you had any paitents die from this?
i think you need the meetings too.I know you have done some research but please do some more.
all from liver damage?
no from overdose
any from liver?
I have not had direct experience from it
probably a good thing/
I look at it as being irrelevant what it was since it was related to alcohol and drugs...I know how devastating the disease can be.
it truely sucks
I know it does
please get extra support.
that s what is needed here
would you be against group treatment thats not AA
wich is what Kiaser avocated
I am not against anything that gives you extra support!!
I am all for it.
what a crappy hand to be delt.
yes but take power of that crappy hand and turn it into a good one
how common is substance abuse post break up?
If the propensity exists before hand it is common to fall back into it
Im rooting for you! but you must set up more for yourself.
its very hard to do.
no it is not
there should be nothing in your way if you want this.
can you tink of anything else including aa that may help
assuming i did AA.
group, intensive outpatient program, halfway house...all of these things you can address with you therapist and let him help you figure out what will work best and how to make it happen.
what is a halfway house pre tale?
after inpatient and before being on your own...live there. find work, stay sober
who pays for that?
im nto sure i would benafit from that
do you see how you roadblock most things?
i can see that, yes.
good now cut it out! :-)
let me rephrase that, if my therapist thought id benafit, id look into it.
if you want to be sober then you must do everything in your power to do so
fine then discuss it all with him
and let him know just how much you are struggling and yu had a drink and you wrote to the ex
i may be putting to much faith in him.
put faith into yourself
in the end it is only you that can do things to help yourself with the proper support
so another question.
unrelated to drinking.
How common is it to paint ex partners in a better light than they deserve.
common when it is hard to accept the reality which you havent
and we all idelaize things at times as it makes us feel a bit better about ever being there in the first place
In your opnion, am i behind the curve here
or is this par for the course
or is there no set course
everyones path is different
i have been considering church btw
im not practicing
but for something to do
ppl to talk to
but one common thing is that none of us can tackle such a heavy disease on our own
i dont see how some ppl deal with these things alone.
I like anything that gets you connected to others and the outside world...you can also look into kabballah....less religion focused
i was lookign into a catholic church
of all things
for no reason other than because.
well check out kaballah....it could be right up your alley.
spend some time on their site when we are done.
thats your homework assignment for tonight. you do well with a plan so scour the site from top to bottom!
thanks for the chat.
my pleasure always