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Hi, me and my ex have been on and off for three years. The

first year was perfect, then...
Hi, me and my ex have been on and off for three years. The first year was perfect, then the second year came and he proposed to me. I said yes and wore the rings on and off until one day I decided to sell them because I needed the money to pay my bills. He was truly hurt and said it made him feel less of a man. So, to sum things up we see each other from time to time and even have adult relations. He moved next door to me six months ago, so, it is really hard to move on, not that I really want to. He claims he loves me one week then he switches and says he cares about me and we should be friends. I am confused. So, I decided to take a break out for myself and I even told him, he thinks that I may not return. Who knows. Anway, how do I really know when to move on and what are the best ways to move on without looking back, even though your ex lives next door. He is not much help because he think that I cannot move on. Lets face it, I care about him, but I am not obsessed with hm. The whole thing is confusing. Sometimes I want to move on and sometimes I don't. I still care for him though, but he does not believe it sooooo..... what should I do???????
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Answered in 1 minute by:
7/2/2012
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,694
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified

CoachJenK :

Hi. Welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.

CoachJenK :

Time to move on! clearly this dance between the two of you will not end until one of you sticks to their guns and just cuts the cord.

CoachJenK :

He knows he can come in and out of your life because you let him.

Customer:

Can you please tell me some ways to move on? He lives next door so it is kind of hard.

CoachJenK :

why did he move next door?

Customer:

Good question.... I do not know he claims he likes the house because it has alot of space.

CoachJenK :

he is playing a game and it just comes down to you saying to yourself enough is enough and you deserve more....when you FULLY believe that then moving on will not be tough.

CoachJenK :

but you are not fed up enough yet and on some level enjoy it too which is why you cant move on.

CoachJenK :

respect yourself and your desires more and it will come naturally.

Customer:

You are right very true. I always say let things happen naturally, you just confirmed it.

CoachJenK :

exactly. now we are on the same page.

CoachJenK :

you arent ready to move on...when you are fed up enough you will be and then you wont look back.

Customer:

Thanks great answer I somewhat knew this but was scared to say it. Once again thanks!!!!!

CoachJenK :

I could give you a bullet point list such as no calls, walk past him when you see him, blah blah blah but it wont help until you are truly ready.

TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,694
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified
TherapistJen and 87 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 5 years ago
Good advice
My pleasure. Come back and request me anytime.
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,694
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified
TherapistJen and 87 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
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TherapistJen
TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3,694
3,694 Satisfied Customers
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker

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