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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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This is still the same problem with this 13 1/2 year relationship.

Customer Question

This is still the same problem with this 13 1/2 year relationship. He is having some health issues but does not want to talk about it. He does not call me--I have been calling him in the evenings and talk about 3-5 minutes asking him how he is. Sometimes he acts really irritated and says he is tired of people asking questions. Other times he is very calm and talks in a real calm manner. I don't know what is going on--he said he had been at the hospital last night but won't explain what for. He is somebody who has never been sick--won't even take a flu shot. I don't know if there is something really seriously wrong and he cannot talk about it but he won't say anything to me. I feel like I am just hanging in mid air. I guess it is best to have no contact.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 5 years ago.
Hello. It sounds as though he is under a lot of stress. SOmeone who has never been sick before and is now going through this on top of the relationship problems you are both having is probably a lot for him to handle right now. It sounds as though you are not living together at the moment. I would call him and tell him that you really want to work things out, but it sounds as though he may want some space right now, so you are going to back off a bit and let him get his head on straight. Let him know that you are always there for him and for him to call YOU when he wants to talk. Then I would sit and wait it out. You don't want to just cut off all contact if your end goal is to try and work things out, but allowing him some space and at the same time letting him know that you are giving him this space and not just walking away could benefit the both of you.
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Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I appreciated all of the answers that I received--I just wanted to say that my boyfriend passed away following surgery last Tuesday
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 5 years ago.
Oh no! I'm so sorry. My condolences.